Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Karma's a Bitch* #6

Shamma’s P.O.V

It started ringing once more, but this time it seemed like an international call. I thought I’d just ignore, but they kept calling, once, twice, 3 times, so I picked it up.
"Umm, hello?"
"Hey you, guess who"
I recognized this deep masculine voice, but I I couldn't quite put a face to who the voice belonged to. “Uhh..”
“Shu shammo shaklech nsaitena ..”

“uhh ha..” I stuttered

The person on the other side of the line just laughed.
That laugh! I thought.

“oh my god 7amdan is that you?!” I screamed into the phone.

“haih it’s me who else would it be ya3ne?” he teased.

I gasped, “you remember me! I’m flattered, wallah I truly am.”

“hahaha very funny shammoh”, he said sarcastically.

“lala 9dg I’m surprised u called, I thought u forgot all about me.”

“how can I ever forget u little sis?” he chuckled.

“Soo how r u? and sh7al ma6oor? how’s the U.S? did u buy me anything?..” I just kept on blabbering and throwing questions at him.

“woah woah shway shway 3alay, everything’s great, we’re all fine, the States’s amazing. El mhm el mhm, the reason I called in the first place is cuz I wanted to ask you etha u wana come visit us for a while since you’ve got a holiday n all.”

“haaaih akeed I wana come! when? did u talk to mom and dad?” I yelled excitedly.

“yeah everything’s been taken care of, it’s just that I wanted to check with you and see if u feel like coming”, he replied, “oh and FYI the flight’s tomorrow”, he mumbled.

“what?!! tomorrow?! shu 2mrw?!! but I’m not ready yet!” I shrieked frantically.

“too bad, dabri 3mrch”, he chuckled, “yala I g2g now so I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“god okay”, I mumbled, “bas 7amdaan I ..” he hung up and I heard the dial tone. I sighed, sometimes my brother could be such a hard ass.

I groaned as I walked back to my room and flopped back down on my bed, only to stare up at the ceiling. I better get a goodnight sleep, I thought to myself.

*Next Day*
“bas you guys, umm my flight leaves tonight”, I mumbled to my friends as we were having lunch at Hédiard.

HE was there, even though I had not glanced his way since I entered, I knew that he had yet to take his gaze off of me. I could feel him boring holes into my skin with his eyes. He wanted me to look at him, to stare into those pleading eyes of his and listen to him. That reason alone is why I refused to acknowledge his presence, for if I took the chance and looked at him, I might fall into his trap and be just another name on his list.

“Shammoh are you serious?! 3nbo tawch radah, why are you going back now?”

“yeah tawna radeen, it’s just been a couple of months!” Meera cried out.

I was hardly listening to what they were saying. I didn’t care, it didn’t matter to me how much they tried to convince me to stay, there’s no way I’m gona change my mind. I could see him getting up from his seat and I hear footsteps coming toward us. He stood right by our table pretending to talk to one of the waiters, but I just continued to ignore his presence.

“madre a7s I wana go back, and I will go back, everything seems to be better back at the States”, I said as I drummed my fingers lightly against the maple colored table.

As soon as I said that one sentence, everything seemed to happen in slow motion. His perfect face slowly turned towards me, and I found it hard to swallow. He looked shocked, like he wasn’t expecting me to go back so soon. He dug into his pocket, pulled out his cell phone and frantically began punching some stuff on it.

A few seconds later, he walked back to his seat and I felt my phone vibrate on the table. New text. I opened it up to see who it was. I frowned.

“Are you seriously leaving tonight? Look, I’m sorry about what happened, just forget everything that has happened and let’s go back to how we used to be, like way back, just friends. I guess I screwed up, so sorry. –5leefah”

I bit my lip. Did I want to forgive him? My first reaction was no. Usually I hated going with my first reaction, but in this situation, I felt it fit. I clicked reply and typed furiously.

“I don’t think I wana be friends anymore. You fucked up. There's no chance of us being together if that was what you wanted.” I sent to him. I tapped my fingers against the table waiting for a reply.

I was pretty much numb. No incredible feelings were rushing through me like before. It was as if I was in some sort of trance. The trauma, probably now that I think about it. I felt absolutely nothing, and it was horrible. The hole in my chest where he was, was simply an empty space now that he was gone. Him and I used to be really close, the fact he could simply shatter everything we had like that made me wonder if he ever felt anything for me at all. Sure, he claimed to love me, but did he really? I didn’t think so.

I was so lost in my thoughts that I jumped when my phone vibrated again.
“I know, and I’m sorry. I don’t know what came over me, what made me want to do that. I know that’s not an excuse, but it’s all I got. I need some serious help.”

I chuckled a bit before replying.
“No, it’s not an excuse, and yeah you should get help.” When I was done texting, I took a quick glance at him and he was staring at his cell with a frown formed on his face.

I received another new text and got startled again.
“Yeah, I should. I really wanna talk to you about what happened, face to face, again.” he admitted. I gulped. Was I comfortable with seeing him again? The obvious answer was: not in the slightest.

“I don’t. I’m not comfortable around you anymore, 5leefa. I’m sorry, but I don’t think we should be talking to each other right now.” It was probably incredibly pathetic of me to say something like that over text, but I couldn’t do much else without having some sort of breakdown. Funny, I still didn’t cry. Not one tear had been shed. I’d been thinking about crying, sobbing really, like before, but I never did. He texted back quickly.

“Okay. I don’t blame you. I’m sorry again.” Not even then did I lose my self-control. I simply shut my phone and stared at my friends without blinking at all. I wasn’t sure exactly how to deal with all of this. I could see him getting up and heading to the seats outside.

I started to tremble again, holding myself in a way. Still there were no tears. I started to wonder what I was going to tell other people about what had happened. We used to be so close, everyone knew that. I sure as hell wasn’t about to tell them the real reason, so I had to think of some sort of cover story. A fight about something I didn’t want to talk about, possibly? I supposed it could work. I sighed, letting my head fall back against the chair, my gaze still firmly fixed ahead.

Some sort of battle was going on in my brain. A part of me was just telling me to shut him out completely. The other part wanted to hear him out, see what he had to say.

“agool I’m gona go outside shway, I need to take a call, it’s 7amdan u5oyah”, I told my friends.

“do you want me to come with you?” Meera asked me since she knew that I always ask her to tag along when I go anywhere, and vice versa.

“la 3ade it’s fine, ma ba6awel”, I replied as I walked towards the outer area of the restaurant.

Walking along, I spotted him leaning over the rail smoking a cigarette, “What do you want 5leefah?”

Wow, she actually noticed I was gone, Khalifa thought to himself.

He turned his head slightly to look at me, “ha achofch you came”, he smirked then turned back around.

“Whatever”, I scoffed, “do you want anything or what? ana mb fa’6yatlk.”

“Well, there is one question I think I'm entitled to ask you, considering you just dropped a bomb on me", he paused to see my reaction, but I just nodded.
“Why do you wana go back there?” he asked.

I just stared at him. After a few minutes his left eyebrow lifted a tiny bit, and I realized he was waiting for an answer.

“Is it because of me or something? I’ll stay away from you if that’s what you want. Do you want me to hate you, love you, what?” he asked once more.

I smirked at him, “I could care less if you love me or hate me, it's what they call life you know, life’s a bitch.”

He stared at me indifferently, his dark eyes locked into mine. I shivered. A blank expression found its way across his handsome face, and he didn’t utter a single word.

“Honestly, you know why I wana go? Because it’s miles and miles away from you,” I shot back as I headed straight back in without glancing at him once.

Life truly is a bitch, I grinned to myself pleased with what I’ve just done.


identity said...

7aram why is she so hard on him?
loved the post! next post please!:D

- Snugemz. said...

Yeah! Wayed! Cold 'N' Heartless </3!

M;* said...

ya 7araam laish t3amla eb 7a8araa

love drunk said...

I <3 it simply one word S.T.U.N.I.N.G

Tutti* said...

7aram she's too harshh !

Dazzling~Life* said...

omg seriously no comment

i like how she can face him !!

Anonymous said...

WOW she's so stronge i can never do that EVER but MAYBE if i was in her place i would've done the same and more HAHA ANYWAYZ i LOVE your story SOOOO much your a GREAT writer AMAZING
your silent reader

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