That Perfect Someone ♥

Karma's a Bitch* #26

2010-03-02T22:36:00.006+04:00

Saif’s P.O.V

I woke up late to the sound of Salama’s voice calling me. I was totally exhausted. The whole day with Shamma had kept eating at me, making sleep impossible to find. I had tossed and turned all night, finally giving up and watching some lame old late movie on t.v. until I dozed off near dawn.

I knew I'd pretty much acted like an ass right from the start. tI'd known it while I was doing it. But at the time I'd reasoned that she didn't deserve any special treatment from me. I thought she’d be okay with me kissing her. After all, it was all for attention, right?

I was pretty much lying to myself, though. Mostly I just really wanted to kiss her. Ever since my lips made contact with her skin I'd been completely distracted, wanting a lot more. All that stuff about putting on a show for everyone was me just rationalizing what I really wanted to do, which was for her to be mine.

And then she got pissed, and I got defensive and sarcastic. Then she told me about how she wasn't one of those girls and her reasons for being there were all noble and shit. Every word of it was true, I could tell. That was when I started to feel just a little bit bad about what I'd done, which was entirely new territory for me.

I sat up all night wrestling with this irritating, unfamiliar feeling of guilt, this feeling I couldn't escape that I'd done something wrong, which I didn't like.

The tricky part, though, was that I knew she wanted me too. I didn't imagine what happened. Sure I started it, but she was giving as good as she got. It wasn't like I forced myself on her and assaulted her. Okay, maybe I forced myself on her a little…but she liked it. But I still felt bad about it, which was weird. I guess it was because she was determined to ignore whatever had flared up between us and I pushed her anyway. I could feel something between us spark, but it certainly wasn't love, not on her side, at least. Then I gave her a hard time for it, and I sort of insulted her.

And back to what had flared up between us…What. The. Fuck. Was. That? I had more than my share of experience with girls. In fact, that was a laughable understatement. But I had no frame of reference for what happened last night. That electricity every time I touched her, the way my mind went completely blank when I kissed her and some sort of crazy instinct took over and swamped my senses, it was overwhelming. That kiss shook me to the core…and it was just a kiss. The only parts of her my hands touched was her shoulders and her hair, but that currently ranked as one of the hottest experiences of my life. How fucked up was that? Even now, fifteen hours later, I could still taste her on my tongue, feel her under my hands, feel her hands gripping my hair...

I wondered if it felt that intense for her, too and remembering her responses, the way she hung on to me, I thought that maybe it had. This situation we're in is complicated, and that would just make it infinitely more so. Unlike me, she was able to act based on common sense, to do what was right and not be a slave to her urges. And now I felt like a total asshole, since she was being mature and making responsible choices and I was… not.

Man, I really hated feeling so bad about myself.

I heard Salama calling my name again and I groaned and buried my face in the pillow, trying to avoid her for another few minutes. Why was she even here? She had her own place, but she was almost never there, preferring to torture me instead. Truthfully though, I was sort of glad for her constant presence in my life. It was one of the only things in my life that still felt healthy and good.

"Saif?" She was in my room now.

I pulled my head free of the covers and managed to open one eye. Just a crack. "Shu tbain Salooom?"

"What happened yesterday?"

"Don't ask."

"Uh-oh."

"Uh-oh is right."

"Shu msawy?"

I picked my head up off the pillow and looked at her with both eyes. "Why is it you automatically assume it was me who fucked up?"

She cocked her head to the side and smiled at me. "Saif… come on."

I groaned and flopped back down. "Alright. I fucked up."

"Tell me."

"Salama, this is sort of private."

"Whatever you did, you might as well spit it out."

I flopped over on my back and sighed, staring at the ceiling.
I sort of broke my word to Shamma. I told her that no one should know about this deal between us, but my sister knew about it. I wasn’t able to keep it away from her, so I thought it’d be okay to tell her about what had happened yesterday.

"I sort of…3agait 3mre 3alaiha…twice. And then when she got mad and called me on it I got… mean. And I insulted her. I might have implied that she was a Khalifa-chasing whore."

Salama winced. She lowered herself to sit on the bed next to me and reached out to stroke my hand absently.

"Saif," she said softly, "you know that you're broken, right?"

Well, fuck. Ouch. As if I didn't feel crappy enough. When your adored baby sister, who has looked at you her whole life with nothing but admiration, looks at you with that pitying expression on her face and tells you that you're broken, then you know you've hit rock bottom.

I dragged my hands through my hair roughly and scrubbed my eyes with the heels of my hands.

"But Saif," she amended quickly, "You weren't always broken! I know the good is still there in you! And we can fix you! You can fix you. You just have to try. This situation you're in with Shamma, maybe it is exactly what you need. So reform yourself already! Don't just act like you have! Do it!"

I sighed deeply. She was right. I knew she was right. But I felt so lost. And helpless. And overwhelmed.

"Salama," I said softly, "I don't even know what to do anymore. Ever since mum passed away, I’ve been a total mess. Dad isn’t around anymore and I just have to take care of you guys. I need to. And this thing with Chloe is just so messed up. I don’t even love her bas it’s like I need her for some weird reason. She’s the only one who’s able to hook me up with drug dealers. And sometimes, I think I need that! It’s the only thing that can offer me an escape from reality. It just feels like this heavy, invisible weight is lifted off my shoulders for the time being. Bas at the same time, I want to be with Shamma too. You don’t get it do you?"

I paused for a minute before I cracked up out of the blue. "Shiiit! hahahaha I totally sound like a sissy! Yl3an this shitty, crappy, messed up life of mine.”

She chuckled lightly then her facial expression turned into a serious one. "You used to be that person, used to be. You’re not anymore, okay? If you go back to all that shit, ya wailek! I’m serious Saif, we’re done with that. Stop being pathetic and chasing Chloe. You can't fix everything all at once, so lat7awel. Pick one thing and focus on that. Fix things with Shamma. Do that first."

"Any ideas on how I do that?"

"I'll get to know her, go out with her, maybe go shopping together? Come with me. Talk to her. Apologize and start over."

"You're going shopping with her?" I raised an eyebrow at her.

"Yeah," Salama said, a tad defensively. "I think I’ll like her. A lot. From what I’ve heard about her, she’s a real sweetheart."

"She's fallen into the clutches of the crazed fashion-obsessed psycho! She's doomed!" I joked as I reached out and ruffled her hair.

Salama screeched and slapped my hands away and I laughed, the heavy mood broken for the moment. I felt better that at least I had a plan. Now I just needed to figure out what the hell I was going to say.

Karma's a Bitch* #25

2010-02-27T19:37:00.004+04:00

Shamma’s P.O.V

When I arrived at the university, it was so early that it was still nearly deserted. Meera and I had most of our classes early in the morning, while most students had theirs in the afternoon. There were a few students scattered here and there, but otherwise the building was mostly empty.

I greeted some of my friends and headed down the long hallway to look for Meera. It was too early for the students in my class to be in yet, so it was empty and dark. I passed through by it and into the studio. It was scattered with instruments and equipment, all dark and shut off. The walls were dark with the foam soundproofing covering every surface. The studio had some homey touches added, which was nice since we spent so much time here. There were a couple of worn Persian rugs scattered over the bare concrete floor and there was a sagging, squishy couch in one corner.

That's where Meera sat, waiting for me. It was at least half an hour before anyone else was due in, so we had plenty of privacy.

She folded her long legs underneath her and turned to face me as I came in. She was "dressed down" today, in no makeup and her black hair in a high ponytail, wearing ordinary jeans and a white t shirt and she still looked unreal.

"So" she began as soon as I walked in the door, "tell me everything."

"Before I say anything... I didn’t tell you this before, but SaifandIarejustfakingit.”

That caught her off guard. "What? What do you mean faking it?"

"He wants his ex back, I’m helping, long story. It doesn’t really matter. El mhm sm3yyy what happened el bar7a...”

"aih enti shu hoh eli it doesn’t really matter? Why are you helping him?"

"Ba3dain Ba3dain, now sm3eeeeeny!"

"Shammoh tell me now!” she warned.

"Listen listen listen listen listen listen listen listen listen listen listen listen…”

"Ufff 5alaaa9 I’m listening! Yallah fkeeeny w tell me what happened yesterday.”

"Oh my god I saw the cutest couple yesterday. Seriously, Meeroh. It was like in a movie, with little hearts circling their heads and their eyes going all starry and birds singing and shit. I've never seen anything like it...”

"Wait," Meera barked, pointing her finger at me, "We're getting distracted. What about you? What happened el bar7a? What are you trying to hide?"

I closed my eyes and sighed before falling onto the sofa heavily beside her. "Ugh Meeroh, it was awful!"

"Awful in what way?"

"He was mostly a jerk, a total ass. It was really uncomfortable. I mean, I wasn't thrilled either, but I was at least willing to try and be civil. But he was rude and arrogant. And then…." I trailed off, not sure how to explain the other things that happened, although I knew I'd have to.

There was no fooling Meera, though. She knew my face too well.

"What happened? Did he do anything?"

“Laa. Maybe. Haih.."

"What did he do?" Her teeth were clenched.

"It wasn't that big of a deal. At least not at first. There were those girls in the library and they were saying how all this is actually fake and everything, so Saif wanted to pretend to make out. And at first it was... just pretend. It was even kind of funny. But then... I don't know. Something changed. And then he was kissing my neck and..." I could feel the fierce blush flooding my face up to my hairline.

"Then it wasn't pretend anymore?" she asked softly.

I shook my head, my eyes squeezed shut. Just talking about it made it all come back, his lips on my neck, his fingers on the back of my neck... the memory was making my heart race and I hated my weakness.

Then I took a deep breath because I hadn't even told her the really bad part yet.

"But we got past that. I made him stop and he did, and we went our separate ways. Bas ba3dain, he came over to my place and…"

"It happened again??"

"Worse." Or better, I thought... depending on your point of view. "He kissed me."

Meera let it hang there a minute, waiting for me to explain, only I didn't know what to say. Finally she asked me, "and...?"

"Oh God, Meeroh..." I flopped back on the couch and let my head fall back, staring at the ceiling. The memory, and the heat, was flooding my system. I fought to control my breathing and calm myself down.

"That good?"

"No one has ever, ever made me feel like that," I said, blushing again. I hated that my body always gave me away like that. "This was... so beyond. And it was just a kiss..."

"Shit. Poor you, this is complicated."

I nodded my head, "Very complicated."

Her eyes snapped up to me. She could hear the guilt in my voice. She knew what I was torturing myself about.

"Did you kiss him back?" she asked accusingly.

I couldn't even answer, I just shut my eyes tight and nodded.

"I couldn't help it," I finally managed to whisper.

"Well, that makes it harder. And glty enah he wants Chloe back so mb chanah this is like so weird somehow. Maybe you should pull out. I don't want you to be hurt. I saw the way he was looking at you before and I was afraid he wouldn't be able to keep his hands to himself."

"Yeah tell me about it, bas come on Meeroh. It's not all on him. I didn't exactly beat him away. And besides, I don't even know if we're on anymore. We got in a fight after that...because of that. He said some awful things and I got pissed and said some awful things back and we didn't really talk later on. We might be done. And what I said to him... well, I don't think he'll kiss me again. Which is good. But it sucks a little bit too, t3arfeen?"

"Yeah, I know." Then she laughed and shook her head slowly. "Only you Shammoh."

"Shu?"

"Only you could get into a fight with Saif, the definition of sexiness, because he kissed you, when every other girl on the planet would be begging him for it."

"Yeah, well, that's why I fought with him. To keep myself from begging for it."

I thanked God for Meera. That I had someone I could be so brutally honest with. It felt good to confess what I was feeling to somebody, and I knew she wouldn't judge me at all, even though I'd acted stupidly and engaged in completely inappropriate behavior with a total jerk.

"So, now what?" she asked.

"I don't know what's happening next and right now, I really don't care. I just want to forget for now.."

Karma's a Bitch* #24

2010-02-25T16:47:00.007+04:00

Shamma’s P.O.V

I groaned when I heard the doorbell ring. I forced myself up and dragged my feet across the hall to answer it. Rolling my eyes and in an annoyed tone, I shouted, “I thought I told you not to come!”

I flung the door open and to my utmost surprise, there stood the last person I thought I’d see right now.

“5-5leefah?!” I asked shocked.

“Can I come in?” He was already stepping into the apartment before I had a chance to answer him.

“Be my guest.” I replied sarcastically.

“What’s with the sarcasm? And balach msta’3rbah? Were you expecting someone else?” he asked as he eyed me.

“uhh haa? Laa ma7ad t7arait Meeroh was going to come over,” I stuttered nervously.

“ahaaa Meeroh haa?” he looked at me suspiciously.

He went over to sit on the couch and said, “ta3aly ba5abrch shay,” as he patted the seat next to him.

I walked over closer to him, “5leefah why are you here?”

“Listen forget everything that’s been happening. Can we like start over?”

“Start over? Shu 8a9dek?” I asked as I tilted my head to look at him.

“I want to be with you Shamma. I thought I told you that already.”

“5leefah forget it. If you had said this to me way back, I might have had a different answer. But right now, after knowing your true colors, I’m gona have to say no, I don’t want to.”

“Is this because of hal 7aywan Saif?” he said gritting his teeth.

“Don’t talk about him like that. Plus enta may59k feeni, so don’t get involved in things that have nothing to do with you at all!” I told him as I let out the anger that was buried deep inside me.

“Awanch 3ad matr’6ain 3alaih?”

“T3arf shu? Go to hell! You’re one to talk,” I retorted, my voice full of venom, “the girls back in bu’6abi, girls at the club and now Chloe!”

“Ya3ne shu you’re jealous al7een?”

“ahahahahaha me?! Jealous?! You wish! You could be worth millions to somebody, but to me, you’re just like any ordinary person out there right now.”

“You know what?” I said as I pulled him up by his hand, and dragged him to the door. “Baykoon a7san if you just went back to where you came from.” The door flew open and I instantly pushed him outside. “w don’t come back here again!” I screamed as I quickly shut the door, leaving him standing outside, before he opens his mouth to say anything else.

As I was just about to walk back to the living room, I heard the sound of the doorbell once again.

Ohooo shu mshkelteh haa!

I stomped back to the door and flung it open, “ya5eee what the hell do you want?!!?”

“Damn girl, lhadaraja tkrheeny? If I knew, I wouldn’t have come,” Saif said pulling off a fake upset voice the whole way through, “5ala9 I’ll go back wala yhmch.”

He turned around to leave when I placed my hand on his arm to stop him. “Oh sorry wallah, don’t go. I didn’t realize enah it was you.”

He slowly turned back around to face me. His eyes were full of concern as soon as they met mine. “Shamma shu feech?” he asked, concern filling his voice.

“laa mashay I’m fine, just tired that’s all.” I said pulling off a fake smile, hoping that it’ll ease his worry.

“tg9een 3ala mnu? I don’t believe you,” He chuckled slightly.

"Oh…" I said, because I had no other response to that piece of information and his nearness was making me positively stupid.

"Shamma?" His face was just inches away from my ear.

"Yes?"

"Hold still," he said, and then his mouth came down on mine.

His arms were around my shoulders as he turned my body into him and pressed my back against the door in one swift motion. The vibrations of electricity I'd felt when he had his lips on my neck was absolutely nothing to what happened now. Every single inch of me exploded against him.

His lips moved firmly against mine. It felt commanding, but controlled, and I thought for a minute that this might really just be for the benefit of getting used to being near me, no matter how I was responding to it. He felt and tasted every bit as good as I thought he might. And his scent … I could smell his alluring scent filling up the air around me. I didn’t quite know what the smell was, after shave, cigarettes, mixture of perfumes and something else which must have been just Saif. It was making me feel drunk.

I felt his tongue slip along my bottom lip. Oh, God. This was so not for show anymore, since there wasn’t anyone here! My stupid traitorous body didn't seem to care. His tongue slipped into my mouth and I met it with mine. My hands flew to his shoulders to steady myself, but then I realized I was gripping him hard, pulling him into me. His hands slid up to cradle the back of my head, his fingers knotting tightly into my hair. He moved forward into me and my back pressed into door. He kept moving and crushed himself against me. And now it didn't feel controlled anymore... at all.

My hands slipped up to the back of his neck and I finally got to touch the hair that had been calling to me since we met. I tangled my fingers in the hair just above his collar and made a tight fist. One of his hands left my hair and slipped down over my shoulder.

That’s that's when my brain woke up. Because there was only one place this was leading. And it did not matter that no one's hands and lips had ever made me feel like that. I was not about to let myself do this, continue making out with this incredibly hot and sexy stranger, consequences be damned.

This is so not me! What the hell is happening to me? I’ve got dignity, morals, pride! Bas 3gb shuuuu!?

This is complicated because we have an arrangement to deal with. He actually wants his ex back, as he said. How can I forget that? How can he forget that?!

So I let go of his hair and stiffened in his arms for a second time tonight. He moved back a tiny bit, sensing my resistance. He pulled his lips from mine and I dropped my head quickly, so I didn't have to look at him as I gasped for breath. His breathing sounded just as ragged. He moved his hands to rest lightly, harmlessly on my shoulders.

"I didn't mean for that to happen…like that," he muttered, his voice sounding a bit bothered.

I took a deep breath hoping I could trust my own voice.

"Let's just forget it."

"But…"

"Forget it," I snapped, because if I didn't get mad I was going to cry. "Look, let's…" I was about to go off on him, but instead, I slipped out from underneath his hands and walked over to sit on the barstool. He paused for a millisecond and then shot out in front of me.

He fell into the barstool next to mine before he threw a glance at me. I fought to hang on to my anger. He started talking before I could.

"Sure that got a little intense. But I'm not sure what you're so unhappy about. We're supposed to be a couple. So we got carried away a little bit. Since you're in this for grabbing a hold of 5leefah, I thought that would make you happy. It'll make you ecstatic, right? Mb enti you’re chasing 5leefah? Ma tbainah? And isn't that what you want? Isn't that why you're here?" His voice was dripping with sarcasm.

I drew in a sharp breath and my eyes narrowed at him. Fucking asshole.

"That is not why I'm here. I couldn't care less what this does for me. I don't give a shit about 5leefah or anything else. I would do almost anything most of the time to help out others, even something I hate. On the other hand, even though I don’t care what people say about me, and I don’t care what the public thinks most of the time since a3arf 3mry 3adel, I do care now. They probably think I’m some type of whore. People actually saw us. This might actually get you Chloe back. And that's a good thing. For you."

Okay, I was exaggerating a little. There were definitely parts of tonight that I in no way hated. But I needed to gain control of this situation. And he needed to not touch me anymore. That wouldn't get us anywhere.

He clenched and unclenched his jaw for a moment, staring straight ahead as he thought about what I said. I really didn't want to keep fighting, so I sagged with relief when he simply stayed quiet.

My phone beeped to indicate I had a text. I grabbed it and glanced at the screen. It was Meera. What happened? –M

I texted back. Long story. Tomorrow –S

Saif glanced from my phone to my face and back again.

"Do you need to call someone?"

"No."

His face turned to stone again and he didn't speak. I had no idea where we stood. Was our arrangement still in place? Or were we done before we'd even really started? But I was too upset and tired tonight to ask him, especially since he looked so angry and mean. I was just going to try to forget about it for a little while and figure it all out later. Besides, if we talked about this anymore tonight I was pretty sure I would cry and that would be humiliating to the extreme.

He stood up and walked to the door, without a single word. I didn't want to linger to see what he would or wouldn't say.

I hurried up to my room and shut the door. I heard shuffling in the living room for another few minutes before I heard the door slam shut. Much to my dismay, I started to cry. Not hard, but tears leaked out from under my lids nonetheless.

My phone rang. "So?" Meera jumped right in, "What's going on? Shu estwa that day when you ran off telling me that you gotta do something 3gb ma you asked me all that weird stuff?"

I just sighed.

"Tell me everything!"

"I will Meeroh, I promise. But not now. Tell you what, get to el jam3a half an hour early tomorrow morning and I'll tell you then."

This satisfied Meera and I was able to slink off to bed and bury my miserable head in the covers. I wasn't going to sleep any time soon, though, I knew it. Between thinking about what tomorrow would bring and reliving every touch from him, I tossed and turned the whole night, finally drifting into a restless sleep in the early pre-dawn hours. I dreamt of Saif, Saif's hands and Saif's lips, and Saif's words. I woke up feeling just as close to tears as I felt last night.

Karma's a Bitch* #23

2010-02-21T22:43:00.006+04:00

Shamma’s P.O.V

Oh. My. God.

Fuck.

I latched the bathroom stall door and sat down on the closed toilet. I put my head down on my knees and squeezed my eyes shut. I drew deep breaths, trying all my old tricks from the early days, when I had horrible stage fright during school plays.

Slowly I felt like I was regaining some control over myself. I pulled out my cell phone and scrolled to Meera’s number. I had typed in the text, one word, HELP, and paused with my thumb over “send”.

Why was I texting Meeroh? Up until a minute ago it had been going okay. Sure it was awkward and forced, but we were complete strangers pretending to be dating. It was bound to be awkward. Okay, so he was an ass, and frikin impossible to deal with.

But then he kissed my neck…

I couldn’t argue with the reason he’d done it. That’s what we’re supposed to do, to make people believe that we’re together. And when I thought back, it really had started out innocent. I was even sort of giggling.

And then it hadn’t been so innocent.

So he got carried away, why am I so freaked out?

Because I did too.

Damn it. That had been the hottest, sexiest thing that had ever happened to me. And the feeling when he touched me…my God. Like I’d been zapped by lightning. I’ve never felt like that ever. My skin still tingled at every point on my body that he had touched.

Even after I pulled away, as I looked at him, looking so damn stunning with that gorgeous hair going everywhere, all I really wanted to do was keep going where we left off.

This was bad. But it’s also not really his fault. Okay, so he started it, kissing my neck like that, but it’s not his problem that I can’t control my reaction to him. I was just another stupid girl falling prey to the ‘Saif charm’. I would have to be stronger than this. I could do this. I had to.

I stood up and left the stall and checked myself in the mirror. I might feel like an earthquake just rocked my whole body, but I looked just the same, so that’s good. I caught the girl to my left checking me out in the mirror sneakily. I could nearly hear her thoughts.

Yes bitch, I’m with Saif. And I ain’t going anywhere anytime soon.

I straightened up myself again, threw my shoulders back and headed back to the library. The girls that Saif had ratted out as spies were so engrossed in some major gossip conversation.

Hope you enjoyed the show, ladies. It was all for you. Well, it was supposed to be for you. My feelings told a whole different story.

Saif was sitting at a chair outside the library with his head in his hands. He looked up at me questioningly as he noticed my presence. I shot him what I hoped was a calm, reassuring smile, even though the sight of him made my stomach clench and my heart speed up. He looked at me a moment longer then shrugged slightly and looked away.

Before I knew it, Saif was standing and getting ready to leave. We still hadn’t said more than a handful of words to each other.

He cleared his throat, “e7m, Shamma ana baseer, I don’t have any more classes for the rest of the day.”

“uhh yeah okay me too, I’ve got a lecture in 5 mins.”

I turned around quickly and started to walk away without some sort of proper goodbye.

I stopped for a minute and looked back just in time to see a skanky-looking girl literally checking Saif out from top to bottom. And it was pissing me off for some weird reason that I can’t seem to wrap my head around.

Hey bitch, this may be ‘fake’ but you don’t know that! He’s with me!

All I could do to stand there and stare into space and pretend I didn’t notice her grinning at him and him shooting her that crooked sexy grin.

As I regained my focus back, I realized that Saif was gone already. Suddenly, I whirled around and headed to the main door. To hell with the lectures, I’m going home.

I slipped through the gate to the parking lot and started walking back to my apartment.

“Come on, pick up!” I repeated over and over again into the receiver. “Damn it Meeroh!” I cursed shoving my cell into my bag.

My mind was whirling and swirling.

I was still walking, occasionally picking up the phone and dialing Meera’s number, but every time I had no answer.

“Where is she? Yom I desperately need her, ma a7a9lha!” I was talking to myself like some lunatic when all of a sudden, my phone rang. “Finally!” I breathed in relief as I quickly answered. “Where have you been? I’ve been calling you mn el9b7. You won’t believe what happened!” I said in one breath.

My face turned bright red when I heard a familiar voice from the other side of the line.

“Hey, didn’t know you wanted me that bad. That kiss in the library left you craving, huh?”

I could almost feel that cocky smirk plastered on that face of his.

“Saif!” I hissed between clenched teeth.

“The one and only, love.”

“What do you want?” I growled.

“I think the question is, what do you want? Mb enti eli tawch tgoleen ench mn el9b7 you’re trying to reach me,” he answered cockily.

“I thought you were someone else,” I answered dryly.

“Who?” The question was out of his lips before he could hold back.

“Ma7ad!” I barked.

“Yala 3ad, I thought you were supposed to tell me everything,” he replied smugly.

“Since when do I have to tell you anything?”

“Since you became my girl.”

“I’m not your girl, Saif.” He was really starting to get on my nerves.

“Of course you are.”

“What do you want?” I asked again.

“Just wanted to know how my girl was doing,” he continued with a slurred tone.

“I’m fine!” I said hanging up the phone on his face.

Seconds later the phone was ringing again.

“Hello?” I answered.

“Not nice to hang up the phone in someone’s face babe. Especially not your boyfriend.”

“You are not my boyfriend, Saif!”

“No need to shout love.”

I sighed loudly. The sound of his voice the next second caught me off guard. Gone was the cocky voice to be replaced by a serious and almost concerned tone.

“Are you ok?”

“I’m fine,” I said frustrated.

“You don’t sound fine.”

“Saif, just leave me alone. I’m not in the mood for sa5afatek and another of your games. You win ok?” I was almost begging him.

I reached the building and the sound of the elevator was heard.

There was a moment of silence before he said, “I’ll be there in two minutes.”

“What? Saif? La!” Before I could say anything else, I got the dead signal from the other side of the line. “Oh God no…”

Karma's a Bitch* #22

2010-02-17T20:27:00.005+04:00

i was gone for too long, wasn't i ? =x So sooorry you guys! :*
e9ara7a i wasn't in the mood for blogger, seriously :p
el mhmmm .. i'll leave you with the post, yalla scroll doooown! =p

Saif’s P.O.V

She let out a deep sigh, pulling her arm out of my grip. “What do you suggest we do?”

I paused for a moment, even though I already knew the answer to her question.

I just hadn’t figured out the best way to inform her of it...

“Well, we...”

“We kiss. In front of everyone,” I finally managed to say.

Shamma’s eyes widened in horror. “I can’t kiss you. If I kiss you I’ll probably... La laa I just can’t!”

“She’s not dating Saif. It’s all a scam to get Khalifa.” We heard the girls insist on the other side of the bookcase. Their voice was becoming clearer and it was obvious that they were rounding the corner to enter the same corridor me and Shamma were in.

“Hey Shamma,” I murmured, scooting closer to her with a smile, “See the girls over there? Don’t look!” I motioned slightly with my chin. She nodded. “They’re coming closer. As you obviously heard, they don’t believe this thing going between us. I think we should give them a little something to accept the fact that it’s true, don’t you?”

Her eyes widened in alarm.

Damn, was being touched by me really such an unpleasant thing to her?

“Relax, it’s just for show.”

And before she could flip out or protest, I angled my body across hers and buried my face in the crook of her neck.

“See? No big deal,” I whispered into her neck. She just about leapt out of her skin.

“You’re tickling me!” she hissed.

“Hold still!”

“But it tickles when you talk!” she was squirming underneath me and trying to stifle a giggle.

“Quit wiggling! Okay, I won’t talk.”

She started to squeal, but I slid my right hand up to the base of her neck and angled her head to the side, giving me better access to her neck. I trailed my lips along the length of her neck, just barely touching her.

My intention was to just goof around, give those girls a show and maybe get a rise out of Shamma at the same time. But now that I was here, with my nose buried in her hair, her floral, pleasant scent was making me lightheaded. And her hair, what was that scent? Strawberries. It was such a simple girlish smell. I was used to women smelling like a complex mix of very expensive products. Her silly strawberry shampoo was killing me. And there was this feeling when I touched her like this, like electricity, I could feel it sing along my fingers and down my spine.

It was crazy, and intoxicating, and I didn’t want to stop.

My fingers unwillingly caressed the back of her neck and her eyes slid closed. I dragged my lips back up her neck with more pressure and I gave it one slow open mouthed kiss and let my lips linger. She drew in a long unsteady breath. My own breathing was becoming ragged.

I really should stop this.

I had only meant to fool around for a minute.

I had had no intention of starting anything.

But she wasn’t stopping me.

And it felt really good.

And I really wanted to.

I’ve wanted to touch her like this since the instant I laid eyes on her.

She softened in my arms. My left hand, that had been resting lightly on her hip, clenched into her and pulled her closer. Her hand was slipping up my back, clinging to me. I gripped her hip tighter. My lips traveled back up her glorious neck and then along her jaw. I could kiss her. I’m almost there. I’ve been staring at her mouth all day and wondering what it feels like, what it tastes like.

I pulled my face back just enough to make eye contact with her. Her hooded dark eyes met mine and then snapped open. Her spine stiffened and in one movement she’d slid herself half a foot away from me.

“Wh-what was that?” she stammered.

I held my hands up in front of me trying to look innocent. “Sorry, I got carried away. You smell really good.” I tried a flash of the dazzling smile, but she wasn’t having it. She scooted around to the other side of the bookcase in a flash.

“I have to go to the toilet.”

A high-toned squeak announced the girls’ presence and I turned around to look at the dumbstruck duo. I smiled secretly as I realized that I had achieved my goal.

I then watched Shamma as she strode across the library and into the hall. Then I watched the face of every goddamned guy in the place as they watched her cross the hallway.

They should really back off. She’s mine.

Except she’s not. And the point was, a girl like her wouldn’t be mine.

That’s why this stupid “pretend game” is laughable, really. I could probably get any girl I want, and they’d be ready, willing and eager. But Shamma…she freaks out and runs to the ladies room. So okay, maybe Ghanem was right. She was different and too good for me. Or maybe it was that I was too bad for her.

Except that... she liked it?

Karma's a Bitch* #21

2010-02-07T22:23:00.005+04:00

Shamma’s P.O.V

I sighed heavily, letting my fingers thread between my hazel strands. I stared blindly ahead at no particular thing. I felt an unexpected slight tap on my shoulder which made me jump up to attention.

“Umeeeeh!” I screamed as I half-jumped in the air and turned around to come face to face with no other than Meera, “Meeerooh hay enty!”

“Bsmellah shu feeech?!” she said as she took a seat next to me on the bleachers.

“Ya5e zaya’3teeeenii!”

“Hahah 7asha!” she laughed, “kel ha cause of this light tap.”

We sat in silence for a moment, just watching the empty football field, until Meera decided to speak. “So..”

I cut her off before she had a chance to speak any further, “Meeroh am I self-centered?”

I slowly rocked myself back and forth, hugging my denim-covered legs against my chest.

“Akeeed la, laish ts2leeen?” Meera frowned.

“La mashay.” I shook my head and returned my gaze to the green field that spread before our eyes.

“Shu esalfah? Shu mstwe?” she looked at me with questioning eyes.

I rested my chin on my knees, my eyes never darting away from the view ahead of me.

“Enzain what about heartless and stubborn?” I asked again.

“Where did you get that from? Shammoh, 7ad gayelech shay?”

Finally, I turned to look at Meera, “be honest.”

“Well...” she hesitated for a moment. “You can be a bit... harsh sometimes. Especially if you’ve been hurt,” she admitted.

I closed my eyes for a few moments and then stood up.

“Oh god. Mayarii I gotta go... do something. I’ll see you later.”

I looked for him in the entire university and the only place left to search was the library. It was useless. He had left. Despite that, I decided to give it a try. My eyes widened as I entered and found a familiar figure sitting in the back, carving the sleek wood of the tables with his sharp pocket knife.

“Hey,” I whispered as I approached him.

I look at him, but he doesn't look at me.

One glance out of those coldly indifferent eyes and no more.

That look in his eyes... Gosh, I wish I'd killed myself before I opened my mouth earlier.

“5air?” he said coldly, “do you need anything?”

I was just about to sit down, but the moment I bent down he was up and walking over to a wall covered with books. I sighed and walked after him.

“Ok I guess I deserved that,” I grumbled apologetically, but he wouldn’t hear of it as he moved along the corridor, pretending to look for a book.

“Saaif!” I called out a bit too loud and was immediately shushed by the librarian. “Saif!” I hissed pulling at his polo shirt, but he continued to pretend I wasn’t even there, staring up at the shelves.

Having no other choice, I moved between him and the bookcase. My back was pressed against the shelves. I held my breath as I realized that my simple motion had put me in a very dangerous situation. My heart was racing and my palms were sweaty. Only a few inches separate his body from my own!

“Will you please move?” he asked looking straight through me.

“Not until you talk to me,” I managed to say as I stared up at him.

I nearly gasped as he looked down at me, never bothering to move away. “What do you want?” he asked coldly.

I blinked wildly for a few seconds as I tried to get a hold of myself.

What the hell is happening to me?

“I-I’m sorry,” I managed to stutter.

He eyed me suspiciously, not uttering a single word.

“I realize enah I can be a pain sometimes...” I said.

“Bas sometimes?” he said sarcastically, raising his eyebrow.

“Yala 3ad I’m apologizing here. Give me a break.”

Saif stood still waiting for me to continue.

“And you just caught me in one of those... sometimes. So I’m sorry for saying eli gltah, ok?”

I waited for an answer but he simply stared down at me.

Ma gdart at7amal the closeness between us anymore. It was becoming unbearable.

My breath hitched in my throat at the sight him.

I’ve had enough of this tension. “Enzain 3ade you just step back a little? My blood oxygen levels are becoming an issue here,” I hesitantly said.

**********************************************************************************
Saif’s P.O.V

Nodding slightly, I stepped back but remained silent.

“So...” she started, trying hard to break the stillness between us, but failing miserably at it. Eventually, she gave up and let out a loud sigh before asking, “are you giving me the silent treatment? Cause it’s really starting to freak me out.”

“You talk too much,” I said simply.

I continued to search the shelves for something. It was obvious enah I wasn’t actually looking for anything.

“Shu tsawe hne a9lan?” she finally asked after a few moments.

“You just can’t keep quiet, can you?”

“I don’t like silence. It makes me uncomfortable.”

I shot her this weird look. “What?” she asked defensively.

“Nothing,” she said as I continued my meaningless search.

It wasn’t long before she spoke once again, “you never answered my question. What are you doing here?”

“Reading,” I stated the obvious, my eyes still wandering over the mountain of books displayed before me.

“You read?” she scoffed.

“Ever since I was six. Isn’t that just amazing?” I said with sarcastic enthusiasm.

Shamma forced a plastic smile on her face which instantly crumbled. We continued to slowly make our way down the corridor, until I reached for a book and started skimming through it aimlessly. She simply leaned on the bookcase and waited for me to finish whatever it is I’m doing when we heard two whispering voices coming from the corridor next to ours.

“What do you mean mat9adgeen? Of course they’re together.”

“No they’re not. I mean, one minute they hate each other and the next they’re walking down the halls holding hands and sitting together. Come on, it’s so fake! Ybayen!”

“Who are those shitheads?!” Shamma mouthed to me, as I put down the book and was now eavesdropping on the conversation going now.

“No way. They are so together. The never-ending arguments and teasing each other all the time? All a façade to hide the undeniable attraction that pulls them together,” some girl argued, “and now that they’ve realized it, they’re on their way down major make-out lane.”

Shamma cringed at the statement, her facial muscles twisting up.

“A-ha!” the other girl cried out, “a9lan there was no make-out. Ever! And that is my point. If what they have is ‘undeniable attraction’ then we should have witnessed some major smooching by now. But all we got was pathetic holding hands and sitting together.”

“Maybe Shamma wants to take it slow. You know, maybe she’s still hurt because of Khalifa.”

“Shamma? Taking it slow? Ha!” they laughed, “I bet she’s just doing this 3sb tba Khalifa y’3ar. That girl would do absolutely anything. It’s pathetic.”

Her eyes instantly widened and anger flashed in them. “Shu hal 5aysa! Mnu tt7ara 3mrha?!” she growled.

Shamma began to storm down the corridor, when my strong hand caught a grip on her arm. “Calm down,” I hissed pulling her closer, “beating the crap out of hal 5yas is not going to solve anything.”

“They think I’m... I’m... easy!” she snapped.

“Believe me when I say that you are not easy. There is nothing easy about you.”

She stopped for a second trying to figure out if what I had said was a compliment or not.

“I told you no one would believe it. I mean, we didn’t even fool the nerds back there.” I tilted my head towards the bookcase that separated us from the nerdy shlah.

She let out a deep sigh, pulling her arm out of my grip. “What do you suggest we do?”

I paused for a moment, even though I already knew the answer to her question.

I just hadn’t figured out the best way to inform her of it...

“Well, we...”

Karma's a Bitch* #20

2010-02-05T03:10:00.012+04:00

Show me the LOOOOVE people! =p

Shamma’s P.O.V

“Ready to work on your acting skills? Cause you sure as hell are long way from an award winning performance. What was all that staring about by the way?” Saif asked.

“What staring? I don’t stare,” I said simply as I continued to rummage through my bag, before turning to leave the classroom.

“Sure you don’t,” he said sarcastically before snaking his arm around my waist.

“Hey!” I instinctively slapped his hand away from me.

“Well love, lazem tt3awdain. Our unexpected passion won’t look very believable if you keep jumping up every time I come near you, now will it?” he asked tilting his head.

I rolled my eyes and sighed, taking his hand in mine I dragged him out of the classroom and into the hall

It wasn’t hard to realize that everyone was staring.

This was just weird. Just plain weirdness.

“They’re staring. They’ll never believe this,” I said.

“9adgeeny they’ll believe it.”

“This is a stupid plan. It’ll never work,” I grunted as I turned to face Saif.

“Will you stop being so- “

I cut him off, “rbee3k is coming our way.”

“Sawaaaf! 7abeeeby 3loomk?”

“Hala hala ‘3anooom! Good good w mn 9obk?”

“Tamam wallah.”

“Doom enshallah. Shammani 7ayatii u know Sara right?”

“Haih I do, hey Saroh sh7alch?” I said as I salamt 3alaiha.

“B5air 7abeebti and you?”

“Not bad I guess.”

We stood still for a couple of seconds.

No one was saying anything.

Silence.

Incredibly uncomfortable silence.

Sarah was eyeing us curiously.

“So...” Sarah was the one to break the stillness. She had been waiting the entire day to ask a question, ever since Ghanem had told her the news it had become an itch she was just dying to scratch. So being Sarah, she did, “Since when are you and Shamma here going steady?”

The familiar silence was back, until Sarah’s voice hovered over us again,

“You and Shamma are an item huh?”

“Yes.”

“Why?” she quickly continued her questioning.

“Why?!” I asked. Now that was a smart question. Everyone who had dared to ask about my choice of ‘boyfriend’ had asked something along the lines of ‘how, not why’. “Well... he and I... we...” I struggled for an explanation.

“It’s physical!” Saif aka ‘my knight in shining armor’ stepped in. “She just couldn’t resist my attraction,” he said with the most serious tone in the world, “I think she fell for me when I saved her.”

“From being mugged?” Sarah asked as she recalled her conversation with Ghanem on the subject.

“Haih.”

I just stood in my place, trying hard not to roll my eyes. ‘God! The nerve of some people!’ In my mind a string of curses was directed at Saif, who now had his arm wrapped around my waist.

Sarah frowned a little but decided to accept the explanation, especially since her boyfriend was currently shooting her a knowing look so that she’d stop throwing questions at us.

Suddenly, extreme silence took over as Ghanem and Sarah gawked at something behind us. Saif and I turned around to find the object of their attention and we couldn’t help but gulp as we watched Chloe and Khalifa. We exchanged electrically charged glances as we remained perfectly still for a second. We all watched as the Khalifa walked closer to us, his heavy arms draped over Chloe’s shoulders. He stopped and looked at us.

“Shamma,” he greeted dryly with a nod. Turning to look at Saif, he practically spat, “Saif.”

“5leefah. Chloe,” Saif greeted back with a plastic smile as he possessively tightened his arm around my waist.

Silence. Everyone waited and watched.

“Shamma 3nde some of your cd’s in my apartment,” Khalifa started, “when do you want them back?”

“Keep them,” I answered dryly as I felt my stomach turn at the sight of Chloe pressing herself against Khalifa’s chest. Her hands traced patterns on his abs as she shot me a dirty look. “I don’t need them.”

Khalifa was taken aback by my cold and distant tone, but soon recovered. He stood up straight and mumbled, “fine. Suit yourself.”

And with that he turned on his heels and left, dragging Chloe with him.

As soon as I could, I made my way to the nearest bathrooms, locking myself in the stall furthest from the door. I sat on the covered toilet, waiting for the adrenaline in my system to reach acceptable levels. I felt my stomach flip-flop at the memory of Chloe arrogantly clinging to Khalifa, trying as best as possible to let me know that he was now her property, that he belonged to her.

Arrogant little-

Suddenly I heard a light knock on the door.

I bent down to peep from under the door, trying hard not to ruin my outfit, hair or makeup. I found a pair of shoes tapping the tiled floor impatiently. Familiar Gucci sneakers, to be exact. In a flash, I opened the door. “What the hell are you-“

I was cut off as Saif quickly placed his finger on my lips.

“Do you want to get me into trouble?”

Before I could answer him, I was being dragged out of the bathroom, down the hall and out the side door of the building to the backside.

“Why did you drag me here?” I snapped annoyed.

He ignored me and grinned wildly at me. “Did you see Chloe’s face? And hal ahbal? God, I never thought it would work this fast.”

I scratched my head as I watched him ramble on and on about how the plan was amazing and was working perfectly.

“Pretty soon Chloe will be so jealous she won’t have a choice other than enha trdly. God, I miss her so much!”

Something about the way he said it, the sincerity in his tone maybe, made my stomach turn and I had to fight back the urge to kick him.

“Did you drag me here to listen to your pathetic love struck ramblings, Romeo?” I grumbled, crossing my hands over my chest and leaning on the wall.

“Sm3y, no matter what you say or how nasty you are right now, you are not going to ruin my good mood. I guarantee you,” he said, a goofy smile still plastered over his lips and an annoying sparkle brightening his eyes.

“She practically glued herself to 5leefah!” I said.

“Because she was jealous.”

“Men really like to fool themselves.”

“Batrdly, you’ll see.”

“She doesn’t care about you! Get it through that thick skull of yours,” I said, but he just wouldn’t hear a thing.

“I know Chloe.”

“Right. That’s why you knew she was making out with 5leefah.”

At that, the smile on his face crumbled, quickly being replaced by a strange empty look in his eyes. Without a word he turned to leave, but my small hand gripped him by his arm.

“Look, I’m sorry. Ma kan 8ad9e-“

Before I could finish my sentence, he was in my face, anger flashing in his eyes.

“You are the most self-centered, heartless, stubborn little brat I’ve ever met in my entire life.”

Karma's a Bitch* #19

2010-02-01T01:33:00.006+04:00

This post goes out to all you silent readers ;) SO NO MORE SILENT READERS HAAA ?! =p

Shamma’s P.O.V

“What do you mean she walked away with him?” Ashley asked incredulously, staring wide-eyed at Meera who walked beside her.

“I told u! She just slid her arm around his and dragged him out of here,” Meera explained for the 100th time.

“And you haven’t spoken to her the whole weekend?” Ashley continued to question.

“I did but .. every time I called to ask about what has been going on, she’d make up some excuse and hang up.”

“But-” she trailed off as the highlight of their discussion appeared behind them.

“Hey guys,” I greeted them with little enthusiasm.

“There you are! What has been up with you all weekend?!” Meera asked as we continued to walk down the hall.

“uhh well-”

Suddenly, looking more closely, I realized everyone in the hall was gawking at me, “oh God! Do I have like a giant pimple on my face or something?” I asked about to have a panic attack.

Ashley and Meera both shook their head.

“Then why is everyone staring at me?”

“Maybe because of the weird Saif-loving event back on Friday afternoon?” Ashley said with a hint of sarcasm.

“Oh, that...”

“Yes that! I thought we were back to 'hating Saif’s boney ass' mode,” Meera said.

“Well we-“

I wasn’t able to finish my sentence...

I felt two arms wrap around my waist from behind..

I felt those arms pull me close so my back rested against some chest...

My back was pulled flush against a strong chest…

Definitely a male chest!

Before my brain had time to question who it belonged to, a low whispering voice in my ears gave me the answer.

“Morning Shammani.”

I froze...

My body suddenly went rigid...

I couldn’t physically move a muscle...

My heart seemed to skip a beat and leap to my throat...

Nervousness filled each breath I took...

I quickly wriggled out of his grip and backed away.

“Hey...” I greeted back with much less enthusiasm.

God, this is just so strange. WRONG! WRONG! Go away!

A squeaking voice screamed in my head, but I just put on my best imitation of a smile.

I don't know why, but I could feel my cheeks heat up, and my whole body temperature went up at least 20 degrees.

Am I about to start blushing?!

I fought back a blush when I realized how obvious every reaction I had must be to him.

“So how are you?” he asked.

“Uhh fine and you?” I said as I turned my head to face him. I was surprised to find a perfectly calm and cool Saif grinning back at me.

“B5air dam el galb b5air,” he said as his grin grew wider.

I seemed to zone out for a second and when I was back to full attention, the last thing I heard was, “...do you have now?”

“Huh...? What?” I asked, shaking my head as I realized I was still staring up at Saif who was now lazily playing with the edge of my shirt.

Not again! That Stupid distracting smirk!

I tried my hardest to keep my thoughts focused on anything other than that smirk of his.

I quickly moved my gaze over to Meera while Saif repeated his question, “what class do you have now?”

“umm...” I struggled with my memory, but for some strange disturbing reason, the feel of his hypnotizing eyes on me seemed to block all my thinking abilities.

Thankfully my life savior Meera butted in, “we’ve got math.”

“ohh yeah math!”

“Well bashofch in third period. 3ndna English together right?” Saif asked as his hand came up to brush a lock of hair off my face.

“uhh..”

Think stupid! Think!

“Haih I-I think we do.”

“See you later then,” he shouted as he made his way down the hall, leaving three dumbstruck people behind.

“What. The Hell. Was that?” Ashley tried to ask as calmly as she could manage.

“uhh ,, it’s,, umm...” I struggled with my words, “we better get going, we’re already late. Cu later,” I shouted as I quickly made my way to my next class, dragging a confused Meera behind me.

“But-” Ashley was left standing in the middle of an empty hall as we quickly snuck into the classroom.

During class, I stared at the small crunched up piece of paper lying on my desk.

Written in small bold red letters, I read, ‘what was that all about?’

I looked up and to my right to find Meera staring back at me, eyes wide open.

“Later,” I mouthed.

“Shamma!” The teacher’s voice hovered over the class and everyone turned to gawk at me.

“Sorry,” I mumbled.

The old woman nodded slightly and returned to her dull rambling. When I realized I was off the hook, I turned to whisper, “ba5abrch later wallah.”

Class was over and in a flash, Meera was standing next to me, eyes staring widely at me, anxiously waiting for an explanation.

“Uff yalla 5abreeni! What’s happening Shamoh?” Meera asked as her patience ran out.

I paused for a moment and looked up at my best friend. I really didn’t want to lie, but I had promised.

I swallowed hard and in one low and fast breath, I said “Saifsmyboyfriend.”

With that I quickly made my way to the door.

“Shuuuu?!” Meera shouted after me, her high heels making a knocking sound as she tried to catch up with me.

“Explain,” she simply said as soon as she reached my side.

“Saif and I are going out,” I tried to sound as laid-back about it as possible.

“haaa!? kaaif? Mn mta enshallah?” she shouted.

“Shhhh! Mn... last Friday.”

“Hooow?!”

“We figured out that we have a lot in common.”

“Mthl shuuu?!” she asked straight away.

“Mthl... ma3arf, wayed stuff ... mthl...”

“The mutual hatred that you two share?” Meera said with a hint of sarcasm.

“I can’t explain it to you. We’re together now. Things changed.”

Meera opened her mouth to say something, but I cut her off...

“Just trust me, Meeroh. I know what I’m doing.”

Well, I hope...

Karma's a Bitch* #18

2010-01-26T18:26:00.009+04:00

Was this fast enough for you guys? and it's pretty looong too, eh? ;) you could actually use a break in the middle of it haha :p newaaays hope you enjoooy! :D and silent readers don't forget to commeeeeeentt ! :p

Shamma’s P.O.V

“Well we better go,” I said practically dragging a dumbstruck Saif by his hand. “Bye Chloe,” I shouted with a huge fake smile plastered on my face. I passed by Meera and she was giving me a look that screamed ‘what-on-earth-are-you-doing?’ “Meeroh don’t kill me,” I whispered, “bat9lbch later wallah.”

Meera was just gawking at us, the 'odd couple', her jaw glued to the floor along with everyone else’s

-------
My arms snapped away from his the moment my feet touched the concrete on the other side of the street, away from prying eyes. I doubled my pace as I noticed Saif still staring at me, clearly not believing what had just happened. After a few painfully silent steps, I suddenly stopped and spun around to face him.

“Shuuu?!” I asked trying to sound as annoyed as I could, but the emotion in my voice was definitely awkwardness.

Saif looked down at me and his lips curled to one side for a slight smile. Nodding, he softly said “Thanks.”

I was a bit thrown off by his reaction, it actually sounded sincere. This was abnormal. I shook my head nervously as if trying to push down the strange feeling that crept up my spine.

“You’re welcome bas don’t expect me to do that for you mara thanyeh. Che a7s yatne some sort of allergic reaction just from touching you,” I tried to sound convincingly disgusted but failed miserably and I could tell he wasn’t buying it as his trademark smirk crept over his lips.

He shoved his hands into his pockets and started to walk beside me, “whatever you say .. 7ubi.”

“And don’t call me 7ubi!” I snapped at him as I shot daggers at him with my eyes.

“Sure galbi.”

There it was again!

On his face!

That stupid, dreadful, cocky grin that was making me ...

nervous?

What?! No!

Stupid dreadful cocky grin was supposed to make me angry ,, disgusted ,, annoyed ...

Not nervous!

Never nervous!

I kicked myself mentally as I realized too much time had passed since his last reply for me to come up with a successful comeback.

That stupid distracting grin! I thought to myself as I kicked the pebbles that lay in my path.

Once again we walked in a nerve-racking silence, making me fidget with the straps of my coat. Suddenly I whipped my head around to face him. “Why are you here?” I asked out of the blue.

“Laneh my mom and dad were really horny about 19 years ago?” he said with a smirk.

Stupid, distracting ... eheee snap out of it Shamma! I scolded myself mentally.

“Oh you’re funny!” I replied sarcastically.

He smiled at me and eventually answered the question sarcastically, “walking my girlfriend home.”

Somehow, that simple phrase made it impossible for me to control my breathing and swallowing at the same time and I was practically coughing my lungs.

“Are you ok 7ubi?” he asked somewhat concerned as he watched me bend over, trying hard to breathe.

Saif watched in panic as my face changed from red to purple to blue and finally back to red cheeks and a furious looking face.

I looked up at him, flushed face, shooting daggers at him, “don’t *cough* call me *cough* that...”

I simply started to march my way down the street and into the building with a panicked Saif trailing closely behind. “I hate you,” I grumbled as I sat down at one of the tables in the lobby.

“Same here Shamsa,” he answered crossing his arms over his chest as he stood close by.

I opened my mouth to protest but gave up half way.

I was too tired...

It was Friday afternoon and I’d had a full week.

I just didn’t have the energy to argue with hal annoying ensan.

So I chose to remain there perfectly still, occasionally letting out a sigh or two hoping that he might take a hint and simply leave me alone. To my misfortune he did no such thing. Instead he made his way to the where I was sitting and took a seat opposite of me, with the same annoying grin plastered on his face.

“Ufff shu tba?” I grumbled as I held my head between my hands, my fingers buried in my hazel strands, my eyes staring down at the marble table. Before he had a chance to answer, I let out a heavy sigh and looked up to stare at him, “why do you insist on torturing me? Just go. Go Away. Be free.” I waved my hand at him but he paid no attention to it.

“You know it’ll work. That’s why you helped me out today.”

“No I helped you out because that scene was just so painfully pathetic, that it just wasn’t fun to watch anymore,” I said, “I just don’t get it. Why in God’s name would you put yourself through kel hal embarrassing public humiliation just for her. What do you see in that fugly bit-"

I wasn’t able to finish my sentence as he was on his feet and towering over my petite form in an instant. “Gb’6y lsanech etha battkalmain 3anha this way. You don't know anything,” he growled as he was still dangerously close to me.

A hint of fear sent a chill down my spine as I looked up at him, but my facial expression never showed that. The strong fearless look was still on my face and it didn’t fade for a second. It was like awany 3ad mb zay’3eh even though I was actually zaga el 3afya. I couldn’t help but let out a small sigh of relief when he backed away moments after.

“Look I’m sorry... I- Just don’t talk about Chloe that way,” he finally said as he moved back to his seat.

I held my hands up in the air in a sign of surrender, “fine.”

We stayed in an awkward silence for a few minutes, both trying hard to find a topic that would put an end to this uncomfortable moment.

Saif was the first to try, “so...”

“So...?”

“What about the plan? Is it back... on?” he dared to ask.

“You really like her that much?”

Saif said nothing. He simply nodded. It wasn’t necessary for him to say anything.

I shook my head as I couldn’t believe what I was about to say. “Ok. Fine. I’ll do it,” I grumbled in a low voice.

An instant spark flashed in his eyes, “what?!” he asked in disbelief.

“Are you deaf aw shay? Glt I’ll do it, zain che?”

In a flash he was out of his seat and pulled me out of mine wrapping his arms around me, smashing my small form against his chest in the process.

I froze.

My paralyzed arms were glued to my sides.

I didn’t know what to say.

I was in shock.

Eventually, when I realized he wasn’t going to let go of me any time soon, I said, “umm ... Saif? Shu yales tsawe?”

That simple question was enough to bring him out from his abnormal bizarre moment and in an instant he let go of me and took a step backwards. “Sorry. Wasn’t thinking.”

“Next time you have one of those weird moments, let me know, ok?” I said nervously as I sat back down.

He simply nodded and dropped back onto the chair.

“Why are you sitting down?” A puzzled look spread across my face, and I raised an eyebrow as if waiting for Saif to tell me something I didn’t know.

“Umm,” he mumbled confused, “we have to plan?”

“Plan what?”

“What we are going to do tomorrow, you know. How we are supposed to act,” he said as if he was stating the obvious.

“Oh...” I frowned for a moment, thinking about what the limits would have to be, “we’ll walk together and hold hands?” And with that I slumped against the chair and stared up at the ceiling. A beautiful and expensive-looking chandelier dangled down from the high ceiling, the tiny crystals coated with a thin layer of gold. I started to count the crystals not knowing what else to do.

“Hold hands? That’s it?” he asked incredulously moving his chair closer to mine.

My eyes were still fixed on the chandelier. Nervousness took over me.

“H-haih,” I replied in an uncertain tone.

“Oh come on! Ma7ad bay9adeg kel ha if they don’t see some action,” he said lifting his eyebrows up and down as a naughty grin lit up his face.

“Hey! we’re not going to- There will definitely be no ‘action’. And there will be no one watching me and you do whatever it is you’re thinking about!” My eyes went back to the chandelier once again. Damn it! No more crystals left for me to count! What do I do now?

Saif smirked as he realized what I was thinking, “ya3ne making out, french kissing. Nothing else.”

“You want me and you to k-kiss? F-french kiss?!”

Saif simply nodded.

"I want to kiss you," he forced out.

I was staring at him in disbelief.

"W-What did you say?"

"You heard me, I said that I want to kiss you. I want to be able to inhale your scent, to breathe in your amazing scent. I want to keep it with me forever and ever. Everyday. I want to kiss you so badly. I want to feel your lips on mine," he said.

I looked really confused.

"You can't be serious," I whispered, searching his eyes for the truth.

My face was turning very red and so hot that Saif could probably feel the heat radiating off of me.

"I really want to kiss you. I haven't been able to stop to thinking about you. The feeling of your lips on mine is always on my mind. You're always on my mind. So can I kiss you?"

I was now flushed, seriously!

"uhh w-what the hell? I- I- what are you saying? No. No way! I wouldn’t want to touch you with a ten-foot pole, let alone let you stick your tongue down my throat!” My face flushed in all sorts of ways as I nervously searched for something to occupy myself with.

A roar of laughter erupted from Saif, “HAHAHA! YOU SHOULD HAVE SEEN YOUR FACE! WAHAHAHA T’6A7KEEN WALLAH! 3ad eli ygool I actually wana kiss you.”

My face was flushed by the sudden burst of heat.

“Chub chub don't flatter yourself, I'm immune to you. A9lan you don’t have that effect on me w plus I was just hot cuz estwa 7ar hne and-” I said.

“9eeeeew 6aaaaaa5! yeah right! a9lan I was just messing with you bas it’s not like you wouldn’t like that. I know you think I'm hot and you sure as hell wana kiss me. You want me to kiss you senseless, make the rest of the world just disappear. Don’t deny it,” he said with that smug smirk of his.

His voice was so deep and husky and simply oozing sexiness. It made me shut up!

“hahaha sakatnaha! Enzaaain el mhmmm ... so we’re just supposed to hold hands?! They’ll never believe it and you know it!” he said.

“I. Am. Not. Kissing. You,” I said flatly.

“But-“

“Take it or leave it!” I said as I stood up, my chin held high as if I had made my mind up and there’s no use trying to change it.

Saif knew that he couldn't make me change my mind no matter what. He couldn’t help but sigh, shaking his head as he mumbled, “fine .. we’ll just hold hands...”

Karma's a Bitch* #17

2010-01-24T19:32:00.009+04:00

yo silent readers out there how about you make some noooiise ? =p

Shamma’s P.O.V

Angry footsteps echoed through the entire apartment as I made my way back to the living room.

“Oh god not again! Will you stop doing that?!” I growled as I saw Saif sprawled on my couch, TV remote in his hands as he mindlessly flipped through the channels.

“Doing what?” Saif asked without looking at her.

“Msh chaneh I kept you out? Why don’t you go over to your place? It’s my TV, my living room, my apartment. What are you doing in it?!” I glared at him as I stood there, arms folded over my chest.

Saif turned his head and glanced at me before returning his attention back to the screen. “Ya5e kaife,” he mumbled, “enti shu 7arenech?”

I stomped my way to the middle of the living room standing between him and the TV.

“You’re blocking the view love,” he grumbled looking up at me.

“Glad you noticed, that’s the point. What are you doing here?”

Saif sat up and turned off the TV, “talk about tomorrow.”

“What about tomorrow? Saif wake up. It’s over! It didn’t work,” I tried to knock some sense into him.

“Shu ba3ad it didn’t work? Of course it did,” he said.

“What reality were you in? Cause in mine people were staring at us like we were crazy or something. Everyone knows we hate each other. It’ll never work,” I said firmly.

“It’s going to work,” Saif insisted standing up.

“Ok which part exactly didn’t you get? Cause Bared ashra7 again and again if you need me to.”

“I need to make this work Shams-“

“IT’S SHAMMA!” I screamed waving my hands in the air and trudging my way into the kitchen, leaving him behind.

A few seconds later, he was in front of me leaning against the fridge. “umm .. I’m sorry?” he mumbled.

I just stood there, a warm mug of hot chocolate in my hands, watching him with an annoyed expression.

“I need for this to work...” he started after swallowing hard, “I-I need her back. I need Chloe with me or...” The words seemed to choke in his throat.

Somewhere deep inside, I felt a hint of pity for him but before I could stop myself, harsh words escaped my lips. “Seer 9ee7 ba3ad, why don’t you?”

Saif froze looking down at me. He narrowed his eyes, instant anger flashing in them. Without a word, he turned on his heels left the apartment, slamming the door behind him.

I just stood there for a second, a pang of regret causing me to think about going after him.

Shit I forgot. My wisdom says never hurt a man's ego. Men survive on their ego. To hurt their ego is like pulling the plug on their life support system. Bas whatever, it’s not like I really care about hurting Saif’s ego, right?

But eventually that pang of regret disappeared and I just left him be. The day passed by wala chanah shay 9ar and all was good.

-------

The next day while I was at uni, I let my head fall limply to the desk, while in the background the teacher’s voice rambled on and on about the importance of engineering education to the world’s continued success and bla bla...

“God! Just kill me now and end my suffering,” I mumbled between clenched teeth.

As if someone had answered my prayer, the teacher announced that the class was over. In a flash, I straightened up looking wide eyed at my watch. “It’s a miracle!” I sang out as I gathered by stuff, “I survived! Fakkah! Thank God today’s over.”

“You really do hate this class, don’t you?” Meera laughed.

“More than anything in the entire world,” I answered as we walked out of the classroom. I came to a stop as I saw the infamous Saif further down the hall, “Correction, it’s the second thing I hate most in the world.”

“So we’re back to hating Saif?” she asked.

“What?” I asked as I was too engrossed in my blackberry, not really listening to what Meera was saying.

“Hating Saif. Back on the priority list?”

“Oh top priority! No doubt!” I nodded forcefully.

“Good, cause that little episode in the food court area yesterday just seemed so .. what’s the word? Oh yeah, wrong!”

I smiled slightly at her and just as I was about to reply back, the conversation going on a few feet away from us caught my attention.

“Come on just for a second. I need to talk to you,” Saif’s begging tone made my stomach crunch up as I turned around to see him leaning against the wall, “Please just for a sec,” he practically begged while Chloe remained still, arms crossed over her chest, staring annoyed into nothingness.

“Are you done yet? I told you Saif, it’s over! I have nothing to say or hear from you. Stop being so pathetic, just go get a proper life and let go of this,” she said turning on her heels to leave while everyone in the hall eyed the couple. But he didn’t care. He needed to talk to her, get some sense into that pretty little head of hers, so he grabbed her arm and spun her around to face him.

“Come on!” he growled, “just...”

“Just let go of me!” Chloe said freeing her arm from his grip, “I-“

“There you are! I’ve been looking all over for you.”

The entire hall froze in place watching as I moved closer to Saif, touched my fingers to my lips then placed them on his lips, letting them linger there for a moment. I turned to Chloe with a smirk on my face, “hey Chloe!”

Chloe just looked at me with a frown, while Saif simply stared at me not knowing what the hell has got in to me.

OMG! Seriously, what has gotten into me?!

“Well we better go,” I said practically dragging a dumbstruck Saif by his hand. “Bye Chloe,” I shouted with a huge fake smile plastered on my face. I passed by Meera and she was giving me a look that screamed ‘what-on-earth-are-you-doing?’ “Meeroh don’t kill me,” I whispered, “bat9lbch later wallah.”

Meera was just gawking at us, the 'odd couple', her jaw glued to the floor along with everyone else’s while I was just lost in deep thoughts...

Where did I get the guts? What did I just do?

Most importantly, why does Saif want Chloe back so bad?

It’s like his want for her had become like a need more and more everyday as she disappeared from his sight.

Does he really love her that much? Are they truly madly deeply in love? Or fe shay thany wara kel ha?

There has to be something else.

Something else going on there, behind the scenes...

Karma's a Bitch* #16

2010-01-18T22:01:00.016+04:00

Sorry for the delay. I've got no reason, except that i didn't feel like writing at all this past week :p

P.S. i suggest you read this if u haven't yet! =p
-Khalifa told Shamma how he felt about her when they were 16 and now they’re 19 ,, and don’t be surprised if his actions say otherwise because he is a player che wela che and you know how it is
-A lot of time has passed so they’re not gona keep pining helplessly over each other all the time
-Shamma went to study abroad for 3 years after Khalifa told her how he felt and then when she came back, she was actually planning on staying in Abu Dhabi for good instead of going back to the U.S
-When she got a call from her bro asking her if she wanted to visit, she went to the States thinking she was staying there for a while but suddenly had a change of plans and decided to just stay there and not go back to Abu Dhabi
-Saif and Shamma truly hate each other ,, this ‘thing’ going on between them is just lust ,, she’s a girl, he’s a guy, a forceful yearning might stir inside them and something is bound to happen sooner or later
-Shamma never actually said she ‘loves’ Khalifa, she just really likes/liked him so don’t be surprised if her actions say otherwise too
-Saif honestly wants his ex back and is trying to make her jealous ,, so this isn’t just a way to get closer to Shamma

hope this cleared things up somehow ,, anyways enjoy <3
*****
Shamma’s P.O.V

Meera mindlessly ran her hand through her hair as she sipped her coffee, her eyes scanning the food court area. Suddenly, they widened as she saw a certain guy heading their way and eventually sitting next to me.

“Hey!” he smirked as he put his arm around my shoulder as if it was the most natural thing to do.

Everyone in that place froze. They literally froze!

“uhh hey?” one of my friends calmly replied.

I freaked out once I noticed the questioning looks and daggers Meera and Ashley were shooting at me.

I shook his arm, pulling myself away from him, “hey Saif,” I squeaked in a low voice, my eyes never turning away from the mug of hot chocolate. It wasn’t a very pretty sight, but at least it kept me safe from the hundreds of eyes that fell upon me.

“So...” Saif tried to start up a conversation, but it seemed impossible considering the stunned state everyone was in. The girls at the table seemed to be drooling over him. Who wouldn’t?

“I’m Saif,” he said, flashing his million-dollar smile.

“y-yeah we know,” Ashley simply said as she was probably still too busy fantasizing about him.

The silence at the table seemed to fade away by the low whispering that now filled the entire place.

“Shu yaybnk hne?” Meera finally managed to snap out of her daze.

“uhh he- well we- he’s just-” I said nervously not knowing what to do or say.

“Just felt like sitting with the damsel in distress here,” Saif said as he leaned back in his chair and smirked.

“Damsel in distress?”

“Yup. Shamsa-“ Saif winced as I kicked him under the table. “umm Shamma, here was being mugged on her way home and I happened to be passing by and was her knight in shining armor.”

I was being mugged?! I thought we agreed to something that is more realistic!

“You saved Shamma from being robbed?” Ashley asked sarcastically.

“Yeah that’s pretty much it. Beat him up real good. And he wasn’t small either. Big, muscular, six feet and a half. Huge, giant- Ouch!” he winced as I once again aimed my 4-inch heels to his leg.

Allah y5s bleesah, oh my god shu yales y5rb6 ha?!

“What the hell?" i mumbled under my breath. "He’s exaggerating!” I said quickly giving them a wide, plastic smile.

“No, I’m not. He was huge and he had a gun-”

“No, he didn’t!” I cut him off shooting fireballs from my brown eyes.

“Yes, he did. You just didn’t see it,” Saif insisted.

“No, he didn’t.”

“Yes, he did.”

“No, he –“

“Someone please stop them,” Ashley pleaded banging her head on the table.

“I-I think that the important thing is that you’re safe and nothing bad happened,” Ashley said flashing me a fake smile. That smile that says 'i’m not buying any of this crap, ya know.”

Saif and I eyed each other in disgust, eventually returning out attention elsewhere. There was silence for a long moment.

Not comfortable silence, more like the 'what-the-hell-is-going-on’ silence.

We just sat there in silence for what feels like an eternity.

“Well, we better go,” I suddenly broke the silence and stood up as the stillness finally got to me.

“Yeah. Classes and all,” Meera quickly said following me and leaving the rest of them to just stare at each other.

-------

“What were you thinking?” I shrieked as I stomped quickly down the road.

“I was just doing what you told me to,” Saif defended himself as he quickened his pace to catch up with me.

“What I told you to do? Six feet and a half? And with a gun ba3ad?” I stopped to look at him, incredulous.

“What? So I exaggerated a little,” he shrugged.

“A little? You call that a little?” I growled, “I think you should buy yourself a dictionary because that was definitely not a little. I mean do you honestly think that they would believe you. How dumb do you think they are?” I saw the cocky grin starting to spread over his lips and quickly added, “Don’t answer that!”

With a loud sigh I began walking again, the building coming into view.

“uhh I wanted to make the story a little more interesting?” Saif said trying to look innocent as possible.

“Interesting? I thought we were aiming for believable!” I said as I continued to make my way to my apartment without glancing at him.

I made my way over to the elevator the instant I entered the building. As soon as I heard the elevator ping, I got in with him right behind me.

“Look I’m sorry alright?” he apologized oh-so-sincerely. NOT.

“Sorry?” I started but he interrupted me.

“Ok, could you please stop repeating every word I say? It’s really starting to get to me.”

At that exact moment, the elevator came to a stop.

“Uffff…” I growled as I quickly got out, pushed the door of my apartment open and slammed the door in his face.

I tried to figure this whole thing out.

All I could do was pace around this entire place.

I was pacing like a madman on a mission in my apartment.

What the hell was I thinking when I agreed to this?!

I can’t stick to our little agreement.

I can’t keep pretending.

I hate him.

I can’t stand being close to him any longer.

I don’t want to do this.

Or do I?

Karma's a Bitch* #15

2010-01-11T23:36:00.003+04:00

Shamma’s P.O.V

I exhaled sharply as I entered my apartment, dropping the million shopping bags I was holding, dragging my aching feet on the floor plopping down on the couch with closed eyes and sighing. I was tired from the shopping trip I just came from. My heavy eyelids shot open when I heard a deep male laughter coming from the kitchen.

Msh '3areebah hal '6a7kah, i thought.

“What the hell?” I whispered to myself.

As I stood up and reached the kitchen, my jaw fell to the floor. There, around the isle, stood...

“Saif?” I asked shocked.

Saif just muffled his laughter at the sight of me. “s-shu tsawe hne? Kaif d5alt a9lan?! Oh god what if someone saw you come in?! Shu yaybnk?!” I shrieked.

He stood up, and walked towards me dragging me to the couch in the living room, “I have my ways,” he smirked.

I turned my head towards him and made a face, “I don’t think this is such a good idea anymore.”

“Oh, come on, Shamsa! You can’t back out now. It’s just for a few of days. If I can stand it so can you. I mean, don’t you want to have that ass begging and drooling over you. Just imagine him on his knees begging for you to get together with him and you telling him to get a life in front of everyone,” he said.

Images matching the description Saif had made flashed before my eyes and I felt the overwhelming rush of power and revenge run through my veins. I exhaled sharply, “ohooo ok! allah y3eeeny ,, i'll do it” I said, causing Saif to sigh in relief, “bas awal shay you’re definitely going to have to memorize my name. It’s Shamma. Get it through that head of yours. Sham-ma. It’s not that hard.”

“yeah yeah okay whatever,” he said dryly as he made himself comfortable, sitting on the couch with his feet propped on the table in front of him chanah el mkan mkan uboh.

“uhh aih enta you do realize that you’re at my place?”

“uhh aih enti you do realize that I don’t give a damn?” he mocked me.

“Have I ever told you how much I hate you?” I asked looking right into his eyes with a deadly serious expression. “All the time,” he said, a cocky grin settling on his lips as he stared right back at me.

He got up and walked towards me. He was getting closer and closer and closer …

I saw him standing so close to me, his eyes boring into mine. His warmth and scent soaking through my senses, quickly becoming an irresistible sensation. We stood there and it felt like my heart was going to jump right out of my chest, it was beating so hard.

He shifted his gaze away from mine for a minute and I couldn’t help it ..

I studied his face. No, not only his face. I couldn't help but let my eyes travel all over his oh-so-sexy body, lingering longer than necessary. My eyes involuntarily scanned down to his shirt, where the fabric clung to him, showing off his perfectly sculpted abs through the shirt. Then down to his white board shorts hanging loosely off of his hips.

I shook my head before returning my gaze back to his face. I turned the other way from his hypnotizing eyes so I wouldn’t get caught staring.

“What are you staring at?” he asked casually.

From the corners of my eyes I could see him gazing at me for a moment. I shivered.

I turned my head slowly again to caught another breathtaking sight of him. At that moment I found myself staring into his eyes.

HE IS LOOKING AT ME!

My mind was screaming and my heart was pumping fast, like I had just run a marathon.

I broke the eye contact and I looked nervously around the room. I raised my gaze again at him and I felt like I could die at that very moment.

“Hmm?” I replied, snapping out of my trance. It was as though he'd pulled me out of some fantasy.

Saif was looking at me and when our eyes met I quickly looked away. Like I'd just been caught with my hand in a cookie jar ..

“I said, what are you staring at? I can feel you staring at me. Your eyes were practically boring holes right through me,” he said. I noticed the wicked grin plastered on his face.

Yal f’6ee7ah! Shiiit yl3an el '3abaaa2!

I felt a blush creep to my face, he had caught me staring at him and now he was doing exactly the same thing. He stared down at me, a slight smirk tugging at one corner of his lips.

Saif merely stares. I don’t like it. It feels too much like an invasion of privacy, the way he’s gazing at me. Shu ha? He doesn't even try to disguise the fact he's staring.

**********************************************************************************
Saif’s P.O.V

I found myself staring at her. I gulped when I realized how breathtaking she was. But that was nothing compared to what followed. I stared right into her eyes and I almost had a heart attack. Her light brown eyes completing the view of her face, the most perfect artwork of the most talented artist.

I let my eyes travel slowly, drinking in the sight. I knew it was making her uncomfortable, but I couldn’t help it. She was more than I’d ever dared to dream.

Reluctantly, I lifted my eyes from her body, back to her face.

She was blushing furiously. I couldn’t help but chuckle. For some reason, her shyness was amusing to me. Perhaps because I really couldn’t understand what she had to be shy about. I had never seen anyone so perfect before, not even Chloe.

I leaned in and nearly had her trapped between the wall and me. I placed my hand on the wall beside her, effectively closing in on her. I was standing so close ,, our breath mingled.

“By the way,” I whispered after a few minutes of studying her face, “I know I got you hypnotized, so mesmerized.”

Karma's a Bitch* #14

2010-01-08T02:41:00.003+04:00

Shamma’s P.O.V

I took in a deep breath as I walked side by side with Meera and entered the familiar building.

The guys were acting giddy, staring at us like they had never seen girls before, while jealousy was running in the veins of just about every girl out there. They all envy us.

We’re gorgeous, there’s no use denying it. I’m rather petite, but with curves in all the right places. I have shoulder-length, hazel wavy hair and short bangs which frame my face perfectly and slightly tan skin. My cheekbones are high and well-defined and my eyebrows are high-arched. I’ve got light brown eyes, a sharp long nose, pouty cherry pink lips with and to top it off, a beauty mark right next to my upper lip. Meera is a bit taller than me, slender and curvy. She has long, flowing black hair that goes down to the middle of her back, big deep brown eyes, tiny noise and bright pink lips. She had a beauty mark just below her eye that only added to her beauty. We both had a slight glow about our faces, we were the picture of innocent beauty.

“Ah... Monday! Don’t you just love it?” Meera asked with a huge satisfied grin on her face.

Under heavy eyelids, I threw a glance in my best friend’s direction before shaking my head and sighing, “You’re in serious need of psychiatric treatment, t3arfeen?”

“What? I like school, so?” I shrugged, “a7b when they stare and get envious of what they can’t have.”

“My point exactly. Liking school is one of the clear signs that shows you need MAJOR help,” I said with a serious tone.

Meera’s right eyebrow cocked up and I continued, “It’s true. In any teen’s brain, there’s a logical equation engraved: fun equals good, school equals bad. Therefore if school is bad, this means no happy faces on Monday mornings, especially at 9 am. It’s considered weird, just weird!”

Meera just stared at me and asked, “Who are you and what have you done with Shamma?”

I sighed heavily and said, “I couldn’t sleep last night, again! So I stayed up late watching the Discovery channel. Big show on psychology, logics and madre shu, bas don’t worry it’ll probably go away in- Saif!” I stopped my explanations as Saif stood in my way and blocked the path.

“Need to talk to you, Shamsa!” he said with a dry voice.

“It’s Shamma,” I muttered rolling my eyes in annoyance, “and I can’t now, I have classes.” I tried to move around him, but he took a step and once again was towering over me. “It won’t take long,” he grumbled.

It was clear he didn’t want to be there. He scanned the hall and saw several people staring at us. It was easy to understand why. Everyone knew about the wall of deep hatred between me and Saif. Obviously, they expected the usual shouting and swearing that usually happened within five minutes of us being near each other. This time it wasn’t happening. Why? All the students wondered as they watched.

I sighed and turned to face Meera, “Meeroh enti seery, I’ll catch up with you in a minute.”

“Shu tba?” I grumbled as I looked at Saif.

“Bakalmch,” he said coldly.

“uhh enzain? I’m here, talk w fkny,” I said dryly.

“Mb hne,” he frowned, throwing evil glances at all the students that stared at us, before grabbing me by the arm and dragging me out of there.

“Ouch! Y3awerrr!” I shouted, trying to pull my arm out of his grip but failing, “Hdnyyy!” I practically screamed as we rounded a corner and reached the back of the school.

He stopped and let go of my arm. “That hurt yal 7mar,” I grumbled rubbing my sore arm, “7aywan, stupid, idiot, dipshit, asswipe, jerk.”

“Are we done with the cursing, love?” he asked annoyed.

“No! You’re also the biggest asshole I’ve ever seen and stop calling me love,” I yelled again, “Shu tba?”

“Chloe back,” he answered simply.

I paused for a second before I said, “Ok, I realize you’re a bit slow and all but...” I began to speak slowly, exaggerating every single word, “I. Am. Not. Chloe” I tilted my head towards him, as if trying to find out if he had understood me.

“Oh, you’re definitely not Chloe,” he said with a sarcastic tone, which made me flinch. “What’s that supposed to mean?” I muttered angrily.

“Let’s not go down that road,” he quickly tried to change the subject, “I think we can help each other. You want 5leefah, I want Chloe back, we should join forces.”

“Two things: I would never ever join anything with you and I don’t want 5leefah. I just want him to get a very painful disease which would cause his private parts to fall off,” I said with a huge fake grin.

Saif couldn’t help but wince at the description. Shaking himself out of that bad place in his mind he said, “Ma tbain 5leefah? Tg9een 3ala mnu enti?” Trach tla7geenah everywhere since you saw him that night at the club.”

“Just until I find the best way to cause a hell lot of pain to that bastard,” I said harshly.

Saif paused for second while I just sighed annoyingly and began to walk away. “How about having him head over heels for you?” he shouted.

I stopped, turned around to look at him and lifted an eyebrow, “I’m listening.”

“I can help you get him. Even if you show him you don’t want him, he’ll be begging at your feet,” he started to explain as he walked towards me.

“Begging is good,” I said simply as I waited to hear the rest of the plan.

“And at the same time I can get Chloe back.”

“So shu lazem asawy?” I asked “Pretendtobemygirlfriend,” he said in one breath.

“Whaaaaat?!” I shrieked, “are you out of your mind?!”

“The moment the 2 of them see us together they’ll go nuts with jealousy. Chloe b3dha t7bne I know it,” Saif quickly explained.

“What about 5leefah?” I asked as I turned my head towards him.

“He could never stand seeing me and Chloe happy, 3shan che ybaha. Etha chafny wyach, he’ll want you. Plus there’s nothing that a man wants than something he can’t have.”

“You’ve hit your head recently, haven’t you?” I asked sincerely.

“No, I’m telling you it’ll work trust me, I know 5leefah,” he said.

“Trust? You? Oh you’ve definitely lost it,” I laughed.

Saif kept mumbling something under his breath as he reached into his pockets and took out a pack of cigarettes, bringing one to his lips and lighting it.

“Hey hey hey, no smoking!” I grabbed the cigarette, which dangled from his mouth and dropped it to the floor as I stepped on it. He just shot me an evil look.

There was a moment of silence. I scanned the outlying football field recognizing the form of Khalifa. In the distance I saw Chloe clapping hysterically at each successful pass Khalifa performed. I felt my stomach twist in disgust, and without turning to look at Saif who was behind me I asked, “Shu asawe?”

“Hang out with me. People have to see us together, holding hands, hugging and che t3arfeen,” Saif said.

“No, nooooo way in hell!” I shook my head and waved my arms around as I turned to face him. “I’m not touching you! Maba agareb 9obek!”

“You don’t see me jumping around singing ‘oh, joy! Oh, joy!’ either, love,” he said coldly.

“Ughh fine!” I finally said, “bas we hang out when I want mb 3a kaifk u come whenever you want.”

“What? No! lazem we hang out a lot wela it won’t work!” he said shaking his head.

“No way and that’s final. We do it my way or it’s off,” I said as I crossed my arms waiting for his answer.

Eventually, he gave up and shaking his head he mumbled, “Fine, we’ll do it your way.”

“Good. When do we start?” I asked. “hmm tomorrow?” he said.

“Ok, tomorrow we’re officially a couple,” I mumbled sarcastically.

“One more thing. No one can know about our little deal or it’s off,” he warned me.

“Tstahbal? It wouldn’t exactly work if everyone knew about it, ya thak thak enta.”

“Just making sure. No telling rbee3tch hay or anyone!” he said. “What? bas Meeroh’s not gonna tell anyone,” I shot back.

“I don’t care. No one can know,” he said dryly. “But…” I said, but he cut me off. “No buts, 7abeebti.”

“Fine!” I muttered looking at my watch. “Damn it! Damn it! Damn it! I’m sooo late!” I said as I looked up at him with a deadly gaze, “Kela mnk. Oh and one more thing, I hate you!” I yelled as I ran to my next class.

“same here, el 7ub!” he shouted after me laughing his ass off.

Karma's a Bitch* #13

2010-01-07T02:45:00.002+04:00

Shamma’s P.O.V

The days passed and eventually the looks thrown in my direction lessened. I walked quickly through the halls as I looked at my watch. I sighed in relief when I reached my destination and stood quietly staring out into the field. I still caught the last 5 minutes of football practice, cursing under my breath the entire time as I watched Khalifa run through the field.

“Shammoh, enti hne!” Meera sighed in relief.

I jumped in surpsrise while I clutched my chest to calm my racing heart, “bsmellah Meeroh, shu tsaween hne?” I exclaimed breathlessly.

“Watching you torture yourself into insanity,” Meera stated tilting her head towards the field.

“I-I wasn’t... I...” I tried to explain, but it was no use, I got caught.

“You’ve been following 5leefah around for weeks now, you have to move on!” she shouted.

“I’ll move on when I see him on his knees begging me for forgiveness,” I said firmly.

“You still want him, don’t you?” Meera asked.

“What? No!” I shrieked, “I just want to see him suffer and beg at my feet so I can tell him ‘You’ve missed your chance.’” An evil revengeful glow sparkled in my eyes as I spoke, clearly imagining my moment of victory.

“Shamma...” Meera tried to warn me, but I started walking away, “Don’t even try to talk me out of this one. I’ll find a way to get him, and until I do I’ll just follow him!” I shouted.

Later that day, I was walking down the streets of New York. I shivered silently at the chilly winter night as I gazed into the night sky. There above me was the night sky in all its glory, the stars twinkling like a white veil, sparkling and glinting in the black night. I hugged my coat tighter, trying to warm myself as I walked quietly several feet behind him so I would remain unnoticed. I already knew where he was going. It was Friday night, he was obviously going to pick her up. Bastard!

As the dimly lit house came into view, I left the sidewalk and hid behind the tall bushes. I heard the unnatural rustle of leafs and looked up at the nearest tree.

“Oh, God! What a freak!” I whispered to myself at the sight of some guy moving between branches, struggling to see what was happening on the front porch of the house.

I picked up a long stem and reached up to poke him. He lost his balance and tumbled down the tree, falling on the ground with a thud.

“What was that?” I heard Khalifa ask.

“Probably just the cat,” a sickenly feminine voice answered, it was Chloe.

Saif looked up to see me cockily towering over him, “you’re pa-“

A flash of anger rushed through him and in a blink of an eye he was up, his hand covering my mouth, his body crushing mine against the tree he had just fallen off of. We glared silently at one another until Saif felt a sharp pain in the palm of his hand and quickly pulled his hand away from my mouth.

“Ouch!” he hissed as he checked his hand for any sign of injury. Sure enough he found a small, but deep and flaming red bite mark, “you bit me!”

“You’re pathetic, you know that?” I hissed at him, “creeping around in the dark and spying on your ex.”

“I’m pathetic? You mean to tell me you’re not here because you’ve been following that ass back there?” Saif shot back tilting his head towards the house.

“I-I…”

“Tt7arain eni ma3arf that you’ve been walking around the entire university following him everywhere?” he asked with a cocky grin.

“Well at least I don’t go around climbing trees and making poor little lost puppy eyes every time I see my ex,” I hissed.

“I’m love’s bitch and I’m man enough to admit it,” he confessed proudly raising his chin.

I had no quick comeback for that one, so all I had to say was, “crazy stalker.”

“I love Chloe, I’ve always loved her, ever since I can remember. I’m not gona lose her to some player,” he said.

“Oh, now that’s just sad,” I looked at him with fake pity.

“Like you’re not dying to have 5leefah. All he’d have to do is-” he growled, but he didn’t have much time to finish his not so clever comment as I kicked him, turned on my heels and walked away.

To hell with Khalifa, awanh I’m dying to have him, y5ase! I thought to myself.

Karma's a Bitch* #12

2010-01-06T02:00:00.005+04:00

Saif’s P.O.V

“We need to talk,” my voice was sharp and low as I grabbed Chloe by her arm and dragged her to the nearest corner.

“Saif! What-” she shrieked before I cut her off. “Is it true? Please tell me it isn’t true.”

“What isn’t true, Saif?” she asked with a soft voice as she ran her hand across my cheek. I closed my eyes for a split second before gripping her hand and pulling it away. “Answer me!”

She took a deep breath and sighed. Making an irritated face she answered simply, “yes.”

“What?!” I couldn’t believe what I was hearing.

“I’ve been with Khalifa. I was going to tell you-”

“When? When everyone in the entire university already knew about it and I had no idea whatsoever?” I hissed as I shot her an angry stare.

“I knew you wouldn’t understand,” she sighed annoyed.

“That’s right, I don’t! Chloe? You’re my girl, mine” I growled.

“Not anymore,” she answered plainly.

“But-”

“It’s over Saif, I’m with Khalifa now. I’m sorry,” she said before walked away, leaving me standing there trying to figure out what the hell just happened.

WTF IS GOING ON?!!

**********************************************************************************
Shamma’s P.O.V

I dragged my feet as I walked across the hall, “Klhm y6al3oony,” I grumbled.

“No, they’re not.” Meera lied.

“Meeroh, I’m not blind or deaf,” I rolled my eyes and sighed as I plopped my body on the chair setting the tray on the table.

“It’ll all blow over in a couple of weeks, when they get another thing to gossip about,” Meera said.

“I really hope- Oh, God no!” I breathed as I saw Khalifa walking into the food court area, his arms draped across Chloe’s waist.

“Shammoh, just calm down.”

“God, I swear, by the end of the year I’m gonna break something off of him,” I hissed between clenched teeth as I furiously pounded my fork into the food. I looked at my plate and realized that I had just spread the food all over the table. “umm I think I’ve lost my ap-”

A loud banging sound was heard as we turned our heads, just in time to see Khalifa crash into some guy, sending them both on the floor.

A very pissed Saif hovered over them, “you stay away from Chloe,” he growled.

Quickly, Khalifa stood on his feet and glared at Saif, “or what?” he shot back.

Saif’s answer came in the form of a punch and soon someone was yelling off the top of their lungs, “FIIIIIIGHT!!”

A bunch of driven teens screamed and cheered enthusiastically, coming to circle them as the two exchanged hard punches.

“What is going on here?!” a loud booming voice was heard and everyone turned to see the principal standing by the door.

The crowd quickly hurried away to reveal two bloodied up boys frozen in position.

“You two...” he yelled as he glared at them with angry-looking eyes, “move it, my office, now!”

The two boys still had time to exchange a dirty look as they untangled themselves and walked after the short, bald man.

“Poor Saif,” Meera sighed as we walked out to the courtyard and she sat on the bench next to Ashley.

“Poor Saif? What about me? Publicly humiliated at the club, remember?” I said as I walked around in circles in front of them. “Oh, you too, but... Saif, well... you know, he’s been crazy about Chloe ever since I can remember and to see his long time girlfriend going around smooching with Khalifa can’t be giving him any happy feelings,” Ashley tried to explain.

“Who cares about Saif and happy feelings? He’s an idiot and he probably got what he deserved,” I grumbled under my breath.

“I have to agree with Ashley on this one. Saif’s always been head over heels for Chloe from what I can see. He worships the ground she walks on .. no, actually any ground near that girl!” Meera said.

“Whatever,” I muttered as I sighed and rolled my eyes annoyingly.

“They’ve been together ever since she moved here, like two years ago, and you and 5aloof aren’t even together, you can’t comp-” seeing the deadly look I was shooting at her, Meera quickly shut up.

Exhaling sharply, I plopped on the bench, between them. “God, I hate this university,” I grumbled.

“Shammoh, you...” Meera trailed off as she saw a fairly beat-up Khalifa walk out into the courtyard.

I glanced in the direction of Meera’s frozen gaze to see Chloe running hysterically towards him, wet wipes in her hand, ready to take care of his bleeding lip.

“Kill, kill, kill, kill...” I kept on mumbling under my breath.

The entire courtyard came to a stop as everyone saw the infamous Saif, walk out a few moments after Khalifa. I stare. Everyone stares. We can't help it, you just have to. Besides, he's just so handsome. It's like we are all frozen in time because of all the handsomeness. Everyone was eagerly waiting to see what would happen. Those who expected a big scene or another bloody fist fight were clearly disappointed as Saif simply glanced at the couple and walked away with his head down as he dug nervously into the pockets of his jeans, clearly in need of a smoke.

“You can seriously tell me you don’t feel sorry for the poor guy?” Meera asked incredulously.

“hmm... no?” I said sarcastically, “I’m too occupied with hating Khalifa and that skanky ho to feel any sort of sympathy for anyone, especially not that idiot.”

“Why do you hate him so much?” Meera asked since she had never quite understood it.

“Ok, need I remind you the first time I met him was when he bumped into me at the airport, didn’t bother to pick up the stuff he dropped and all he had to say was ‘sorry princess’?”

Meera’s eyebrows came together in a painful frown as she remembered that day.

“Plus he’s so full of himself, and cocky and annoying as hell with that ridiculous smirk. He just keeps pissing me off, thinking everyone wants him and... he’s a jerk!” I said frustrated before we stood up and walked to our classes, “I just don’t like him that’s all.”

And he has made these past few weeks a living hell since I first saw him!

Karma's a Bitch* #11

2010-01-05T03:40:00.002+04:00

Shamma’s P.O.V

The moment I walked into the large door, I felt the burden of a hundred eyes on me. I felt like I was in one of those cheesy teen movies, walking in slow motion through the halls while everyone turned to gawk at me, a look of pity plastered on all those faces. The fact that it was still the first day of university didn’t help at all. I felt my stomach turn and my breakfast quickly crawling its way up.

I slammed my hand against my mouth and made a run for the girl’s bathroom. Once I got there, I entered the nearest available stall and threw myself into it. Dropping limply next to the toilet, I threw up.

I breathed heavily, my head still hovering over the toilet as I waited for the next wave of nausea to take over. I stayed there for a few minutes, waiting for everyone to clear out of the restroom. The ringing of the bell sounded and I imagined having to face all those people again.

By now, the few students that hadn’t been at the club to witness my total humiliation had already heard of all the details.

“God, I hate my life,” I exhaled noisily as I banged my head against the door before standing up.

Slowly, I turned the tap and let the water run for a while before splashing my face with the crystal liquid. I looked up at the mirror to see my pathetic expression staring back at me as I reapplied my makeup. I shook my head and closed my eyes for a second, searching for the courage to leave that bathroom.

“Let the drama begin,” I mumbled pushing the door open and walking down the hall.

“Why if it isn’t the spoiled little rich brat?!”

I felt the pain in my belly increase at the sound of the familiar voice. I stopped dead in my tracks, but never turned to face him, instead I waited for him to stand in front of me.

“Late for class are we? Now, what would everyone think of that, Shamsa?” he mocked with fake concern in his voice.

“It’s Shamma! What do you want, blondie?” I hissed at him.

“Me? Nothing. Just being polite,” he answered with a cocky grin.

“You? polite? ha!” I laughed forcibly as I restarted walking.

He followed me, “so, what are you doing out of class?”

I stopped and turned to face him with a frown.

‘Does he seriously have no idea?’ I thought to myself as I saw him shove his hands into the pockets of his hoodie waiting for an answer.

“Why don’t you ask your skanky girlfriend?” I shot back.

“Hey! Don’t call Chloe that!” he said as anger flashed in his eyes.

“Why? That’s what you call people who go around making out with someone who isn’t their boyfriend,” I said as I looked straight into his eyes.

“3an shu ttkalmain?” he hissed back.

“Atkalam 3an your girlfriend and Khalifa having a major make out session in front of everyone at some club on Saturday,” I talked quickly as the images of that evening flashed before my eyes and I could feel my blood boil.

Suddenly, his hands were on my arms and I felt my back slam against the lockers. He glared at me, teeth clenched tightly. “You better take that back,” he hissed angrily.

I swallowed hard as I tried to calm my racing heartbeat. “It’s true,” I said, the words coming out in a flood of anger.

“You’re lying!” he accused me.

“Apparently, you didn’t know your sweet girlfriend has been going out with Khalifa,” I said.

He closed his eyes for a second as he tried to get his nerves under control and stop himself from doing anything he’d regret later.

“You don’t believe me? Go ask your girlfriend,” I said as I gathered my courage, grabbed his hands and forced him to let go of my arm, “now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got classes to go to.” And with that I turned around and quickly made my way to class.

‘He doesn’t know?’ was the tune that kept replaying in my head the whole time.

Karma's a Bitch* #10

2010-01-04T01:40:00.003+04:00

Shamma’s P.O.V

A couple of weeks have passed since Meera has arrived, Khalifa and I just continued to ignore each other’s presence like we used to, Saif turned out to be taken by some American girl. I never know why he came to talk to me that day, he’s basically being a jerk to me every time we bump into each other and vice versa. A wall had been built between us, a wall of hate. The holidays were almost over, university was starting in a few days, Meera and I had a change of plans since we decided to stay in the States for university instead of heading back. Both Khalifa and Saif turned out to be in the same university as us, isn’t that just great?

We just go out from the movies with a couple of friends, when we passed by some club and they decided to go in just for the hell of it. A cloud of thick smoke engulfed us we walked into the club.

“I hate these places,” I whined as I practically coughed my lungs out.

“Oh, come on honey, it’s not that bad,” Ashley, a friend of ours, said.

“Yeah, it’s even worse!” Meera complained.

“Shut up you guys, let’s dance,” Ashley said giddily as she practically dragged the rest of the girls to the dance floor.

Meera and I just stayed behind and stared into the crowd. A strange look was plastered on the Meera’s face, she seemed kinda pale. Before I could ask her what was wrong, the rest of the girls returned.

“Meera? Are you ok? What’s wrong?” Ashley asked.

“Oh, nothing. Maybe we should all just go home,” Meera replied.

“Go home?” Ashley’s voice hovered over us, “we just got here.”

“But, we should just go. I-I’m tired and… I need to go,” Meera’s mind seemed to be searching frantically for an excuse.

“Meeroh, shu feech?” I could easily read the fear and nervousness in my best friend’s eyes.

“Mashay ok?! let’s just go,” Meera insisted as she glanced out of the corner of her eyes.

“what-” I stopped as I followed her gaze.

I couldn’t help it, I tried to fight back the dreadful feeling that was boiling and erupting from inside me. It was a feeling that I couldn’t describe, it made me feel... weak physically, and emotionally. And that was something I’m sure I never was before now. I wasn’t weak before this point, but now, it seemed I was. I had always told myself that people only felt this way toward me. And yet, now, I was getting my own fair deal of this dreadful feeling. It made me want to scream, to cry out when no one was looking.

Jealousy. I was jealous.

It was that plain, that simple. I was never jealous of anyone.

“5leefah?” I felt as if the ground had been ripped from under her feet.

I didn’t want to believe my eyes. Khalifa, my Khalifa, the one I secretly liked, the one who claimed to have feelings for me, was actually out on the dance floor, arms tightly wrapped around a tall, skinny woman, whose black hair cascaded down her back as she danced against him.

“What...” I couldn’t speak as the lump in my throat grew to the point I thought I couldn’t breathe anymore.

“Shammoh, I-I’m sorry, I...” Meera stuttered clumsily as she saw the pain plastered over my face.

I watched as the skanky girl kissed Khalifa’s neck while he closed his eyes in a clear sign of pleasure. Slowly, I recognized her, it was Chloe, the girl that hung out with that idiot Saif. As the seconds melted away, the pain turned into anger and rage.

In a flash, I was up and crossing the dance floor. With all the strength I could muster I gripped Chloe by her scrawny shoulder and threw her across the floor.

“What? Shamma? Wha-what are you doing here?” Khalifa stuttered like an idiot.

“That’s my line!” I growled. “You like me, remember?” I said sarcastically, “you aren’t supposed to be here groping this trashy thing while she’s sucking on your neck.”

“Hey!” Chloe objected. Before she could say anything else, my small hands were on her throat and we fell to the ground in a violent catfight.

“Shamma!” Meera called out, “someone, do something?”

“What…? Huh?” one of the girls snapped out of her daze, grabbed me by the waist, and pulled me off a badly beat-up Chloe who could barely sit up.

“Let go of me!” I yelled off the top of my lungs as I wildly kicked the air and my nails dug into the girl’s hand. “I’m gonna kill you!” I continued to shout at Chloe.

“Calm down Shamma, this isn’t the way!” Meera tried to explain, but I would have none of it.

The rage cursed through my veins, my eyes flashed brightly with fury.

“You’re insane!” Chloe screamed as she finally managed to stand up with Khalifa’s help.

“Get your hands away from-” I shouted.

“From who? From him?” Chloe asked, the arrogance building up in her sharp accent as she pointed toward Khalifa. “He’s not even yours, sweetie. Do you really think that he would be satisfied with a little thing like you. Please. He’s been coming to me, to me, for months now,” she hissed, “did you really think that he’d want to be with you? Ha! I had to bite my lip every time I walked by you, just so I wouldn’t start laughing at just how incredibly pathetic you looked while ogling him.”

I felt as if the air had just been sucked out of the room and I couldn’t breathe. I opened and closed my mouth repeatedly as I tried to speak, but I couldn’t. All eyes were on me, I could hear the snickering and whispering in the background growing.

“5leefah..” I finally managed to whisper.

He simply looked at the floor, never giving me a glance.

“I.. I.. I have to go,” I breathed as I ran out of the club, tears trickling down my cheeks.

Karma's a Bitch* #9

2009-12-31T03:20:00.007+04:00

Shamma’s P.O.V

He smirked and leaned closer to me, so close that I could feel his breath on my skin, “hmm, no way in hell,” he whispered before he turned around, walked into his apartment and shut the door leaving me standing there flushed and frustrated like hell.

I let out a frustrated scream and shouted, “Grow up, will ya?!” before I stormed down the hall, my thoughts racing a thousand miles per minute. Catching the elevator just in time, I closed my eyes and leaned on the back wall, trying to breathe.

The door clicked open and I stepped out into the lobby, still a bit irritated about what had happened. I walked through the lobby and out onto the sidewalk out front. I leaned back against the wall as I looked up at the night sky watching the billions of tiny stars twinkling.

I sighed as I called Meera once again, muttering as I dialed the numbers, “Pick up, pick up, pick up.” Then, I froze, hearing the faint sound of a familiar ringtone jingling away from someplace nearby. “Weird..” I muttered as a slightly puzzled expression appeared on my face.

I quickly looked around, searching the crowd for Meera who was nowhere to be seen. After a while of searching, I finally spotted her and my face exploded with happiness. I ran towards her and practically squealed, “Meeeeroooh!” earning some surprised glances our way. “Surprised?” Meera asked as her face broke into a wide grin.

I threw my arms around her tightly and yelled excitedly, “Why didn't you tell me you were coming here?!”

"Shammoh- can't breathe- too.. tight,you're suffocating me," she choked out.

“Oh! shit.. sorry,” I muttered and let go of her, holding in a giggle. “Dude! I've got SO much to tell you! You’re not gona believe what happened, juicy stuff!” I said eagerly.

“Oh my gosh tell me!” Meera shrieked excitedly as she gave me all her attention preparing herself for some extremely juicy gossip.

“Ta3aly ta3aly let’s sit,” I said as I literally dragged her to sit at one of the café tables in the lobby. “T5aylay-”

Meera let out a low whistle, “now that’s what I call eye candy,” she interrupted me checking out a bunch of hot guys. “I’m gona go upstairs to freshen up and everything ba3dain you can tell me all this juicy stuff of yours,” she quickly said as she got up heading towards the elevator.

I shot her a quick look, “9dg ench mtfayja!” I shouted as I hit my head against the table. I plugged the iPod's earphones into my ears and pulled out a book to read from my bag.

“What are you reading?” I jumped about a mile into the air when I heard the sweet velvet voice from about a foot in front of me. I lowered my book and saw the rude jerk, the one who bumped into me at the airport, sitting directly in front of me. The back of his chair was facing me and he was sitting with his legs on either side, his face merely inches from mine.

But I noticed all of this after. The only thing I could look at was his face.

His blue-greyish eyes were sparkling brightly with curiosity. His messy hair had a beautiful shade of dirty blonde that I’d never seen before. His nose was perfectly straight and sharp. His cheekbones were high and his mouth was pulled into a deliciously crooked smile, white teeth shining through.

“R-Romeo and Juliet,” I answered breathlessly. Get a grip, I thought to myself. So he’s hot, who cares? He looks like a troublemaker, a bad boy. Just like Khalifa. Not my type. Not at all.

“You like those kinds of books?” he asked, shock clear in his face. His eyebrows raised, his sparkling eyes widening slightly in surprise. He was still so close, his sweet breath hitting my face. I leaned back a bit, blinking.

“Yes,” I answered, my tone making me seem a little smug, “some of us actually like these kinds of books.”

“These violent delights have violent ends and in their triumph die like fire and powder which as they kiss consume,” he quoted flawlessly. My jaw literally dropped open as I stared at this boy in confusion. He smirked at me and I wanted to smack that sexy smirk right off his face.
This didn’t make sense, I thought to myself. Boys like him don't like school books, or romances. They're just womanizers, players, trouble makers, dancing through life without doing anything decent.

“You know it?” I asked. My tone was rudely surprised, but he just chuckled.

“It’s a classic,” he answered with a shrug. As he continued speaking, his voice grew more powerful, more passionate and so much more beautiful. There weren’t words for the way he spoke. “Plus, just because you think I'm a rude jock which is what everyone thinks, hot, arrogant, sexy you know, doesn’t mean I’m a major flirt or idiot. And I’m just as surprised to see that you like the classics, I thought beautiful, smug girls only liked shopping and boys?”

It took me a minute to answer him. At first, I was just really sad that he had stopped talking since I wanted to hear more of his enchanting voice. But then I realized he had insulted me. And wait, did he call me beautiful? Does he really think I'm beautiful? It doesn’t matter, I reminded myself.

“Just because you think I’m beautiful and smug doesn’t mean I’m a slutty moron,” I snapped back, “I’m actually quite intelligent and I love the classics.”

“Well I guess we both have a lot to learn about each other,” he said, flashing me another one of those breathtaking crooked grins. He held his hand out and I took it. The electricity that zipped through my hand froze me for a moment, but I didn’t want to let go of his hand. It was a good feeling. “I’m Saif,” he said just before he got up and turned around to leave.

“huh Saif? what the hell, he's local?!” I mumbled under my breath.

Karma's a Bitch* #8

2009-12-27T03:30:00.006+04:00

Shamma’s P.O.V

Just as I was about to turn around and leave, the door flew open and my eyes shot open in shock.

“oh you have got to be kidding me!” I grumbled, “this is great, just great.”

He just stood there before me with a smirk plastered on his face.

“huh? 5leefah?! w-what the hell are you doing here?!” I yelled.

“well, there is this little fact that I live here, ” he said sarcastically.

SLAM! the door had evidently been closed in my face.

I just stood there for a moment, eyes wide and mouth hung open in shock, unable to understand what had just happened.

Seconds later, the door swung open again getting me out of the wave of shock that ran through me.
“oh and by the way, guess you’re not even close to being miles and miles away from me,” he added quickly, his evil smirk reaching from one ear to the other as he shut the door in my face, AGAIN!

I groaned in frustration and let out a scream, stomping my foot down hard against the floor. With steam blowing out of my ears, I swiftly spun around and stormed off down the hall to my apartment.

As soon as I got there, my hands dove frantically into my pockets searching for my blackberry, more frustration pouring onto me by the second. I madly looked around the apartment and then I called out for Jane, “Jaaane, where’s my phooone?!!”

A beeping came from the couch in the living room, I quickly ran over, flicked my phone open and my fingers frantically dialed my brother's number. I pressed call and waited. It rang and rang and rang …
Please please, pick up!

Me: 7amdaaan!! enta waain bl’6ab6?!
Hamdan: balach t9ar5een? shu 5aloof didn’t tell you?
Me: tell me what? enzain answer me, where are you now?!
Hamdan: i heard you before! There's no need to shout!
Me: uff 7amdanoh answer me w fkny!
Hamdan: i’m at the airport?
Me: huh airport? what? why? 3ala wain enshallah?
Hamdan: i’m going to Germany for a while for this uni-related-thingy
Me: why didn’t you tell me sooner?! and what the hell is 5leefah doing here?!
Hamdan: i had no idea, I just found out today. Oh and 5aloof is there because I called him so he could keep an eye on you since I trust him .. and well, to keep you company since I know you guys are close and all, he’s there so you don’t get bored out of your mind, you know.
Me: bas 7amdan, you should know that-
Hamdan: the plane’s about to board, I need to get going, talk to you later Shammoh.

He frickin cut me off! and hung up before I could say anything!
I heard the dial tone. I closed my eyes and breathed out, slightly frustrated.
This is just fan-fucking-tastic, I thought to myself.

I stormed over to Hamdan’s apartment, well “Khalifa’s” for now I guess, trying my best not to cry or scream or break anything I would regret destroying.
I knocked calling Khalifa’s name, but of course the door didn't open then, so I started pounding on it positive that he’s in there. “5leefah open the door!” I yelled.

I just stood there for a few more minutes with him still ignoring me. I started to get more frustrated than I already was since I heard fidgeting from the other side of the door. Oh so he’s definitely ignoring me!
“5leeefah! Damn it! Open this damn door or I swear I’ll-”

**********************************************************************************
Khalifa’s P.O.V

I swung the door open to reveal a very pissed off looking Shamma, frustration written all over her pretty face. “You’ll what ha?” I asked challengingly, “what exactly are you gona do 7abeebty huh?!”

She just groaned and ran her hand through her hair. “Lain mta nawy tg3ad hne enshallah? And why aren’t you staying at your place ha?” she retorted, as she shot me a knowing look that said i-don't-want-you-here.

“How about you go ask your brother?” I smiled wickedly, loving the fact that her face was showing more frustration with every second.

A flash of fear appeared in her eyes, like she knew that this wasn’t good, but she kept her voice steady, “7amdan isn’t coming back, is he?”

“You got that right,” I smirked lazily at her.

She narrowed her eyes and raised an annoyed, questioning eyebrow at me, “What are you smirking about?!”

“Nothing, just that you’re stuck right across the hall from me cuz I ain’t going nowhere,” I replied, my smirk widening as she glared at me.

“5leefah,” she called my name softly, it sounded perfect rolling off her tongue, as a fake smile appeared on her face.

“5air?” I replied coldly.

“Can we at least just try to be civil? Since we’re going to be seeing a lot of each other lately, you know,” she said in a sickenly sweet voice. “We don't have to be best buddies and all,” she added quickly.

“Sure, I’d love for us to be friends,” I said, sarcasm dripping from my voice.
Suddenly, I threw my head back in a fit of roaring laughter, “HAHAHAHA! Now you wana be friends ha?”

Shamma stepped backward staring back at me annoyed and irritated and shot me an i’ll-kill-you look, and if looks could kill, I’d probably be out cold by now.

I smirked and leaned closer to her, so close that she could feel my breath on her skin, “hmm, no way in hell,” I whispered before I turned around, walked into my apartment and shut the door leaving her standing there flushed and frustrated like hell.

'Bingo' I smirked to myself, let’s see how you like that, Shamma.

Karma's a Bitch* #7

2009-12-25T02:00:00.005+04:00

Shamma’s P.O.V

The plane ride passed by quicker than usual. We were going to land soon, and I couldn’t help the big smile that formed on my face, though it looked out of place amongst all the other tired and dull expressions that everyone around me wore. I was far far away from him, back to the place I call my second home, back to where everything seems to be much better.

A few minutes later, we were on the ground. I scrambled through the airport looking for the nearest exit. I found one and ran to it as quickly as possible. Hamdan told me he’d be here, but he’s nowhere to be found! I groaned, flipped my hair over my shoulder, and started to help this guy carry my luggage. As I was walking towards the exit, someone bumped into me, so hard that I dropped the bag I'd been carrying.

"oh my god, watch it!" I cried, bending down to pick it up.

I heard a scoff, and I looked up to see who had bumped into me. Standing before me was a guy not too much older than me. He had a yellow, zip-up hoodie on, with the hood pulled up, covering his messy, dirty blonde hair, which stuck out from the edges of his hood. His hoodie was unzipped, showing off his wrinkled plain black shirt underneath. His dark jeans were ripped at the knee, and he kept his hands in the pockets. He was wearing yellow converse sneakers and he hadn't even bothered to tie the laces. He was a walking dress code violation.

He was undeniably handsome though, that much could be said, but the rugged kind of handsome. He had a scar that ran down his cheek which made him look even tougher than he already did. His intense blue-greyish eyes glanced down at my light brown ones for a split second.

"sorry, princess," he spat.

“what the hell is your problem!”, I glared at him, already disgusted.

"whatever," he said, pushing past me.

"one hell of an ass," I mumbled under my breath, trudging to the exit behind the guy carrying my luggage.

There was a black Mercedes waiting for me outside and a driver opened the door for me. I got into the backseat of the car, it was warm inside and the leather seats felt safer than the plane. I let a smile spread across my face as the engine revved into life. We zoomed down the familiar streets of New York, and I watched the rain trickle down the windows. The lights of the cars that flashed past were hypnotizing and I let them fall into a steady rhythm, before looking away.

I dug into my bag, searching around for my iPod until I found it.
"Jane, wake me up when we arrive," I told my maid, putting the headphones into my ears. The driver shifted gear so we were speeding along faster. I let the music fill my ears and take me away. As soon as my eyes were closed, I was woken by the stillness of the car.

"we’re here Shamma,” Jane told me.

I looked out the window, it had stopped raining but the sky still looked creepy. I entered the building and went up to my apartment. I left Jane there to unpack my bags, make sure everything’s tidy and polished, as I went over to Hamdan’s place.

I lightly knocked on the apartment door. KNOCK KNOCK. No answer.
“7amdaaan”, I called to him, “efta7 el baab.”

I knocked again. KNOCK KNOCK. No answer again. I tried the door handle. Yeah, no such luck.

I banged loudly on his door, but there was still no response.
“7amdan, open the damn door!” I yelled as I kept on banging.

“ugh! where the hell is he?” I thought to myself.

Just as I was about to turn around and leave, the door flew open and my eyes shot open in shock.

“oh you have got to be kidding me!” I grumbled, “this is great, just great.”

Karma's a Bitch* #6

2009-12-23T00:35:00.007+04:00

Shamma’s P.O.V

It started ringing once more, but this time it seemed like an international call. I thought I’d just ignore, but they kept calling, once, twice, 3 times, so I picked it up.
"Umm, hello?"
"Hey you, guess who"
I recognized this deep masculine voice, but I I couldn't quite put a face to who the voice belonged to. “Uhh..”
“Shu shammo shaklech nsaitena ..”

“uhh ha..” I stuttered

The person on the other side of the line just laughed. That laugh! I thought.

“oh my god 7amdan is that you?!” I screamed into the phone.

“haih it’s me who else would it be ya3ne?” he teased.

I gasped, “you remember me! I’m flattered, wallah I truly am.”

“hahaha very funny shammoh”, he said sarcastically.

“lala 9dg I’m surprised u called, I thought u forgot all about me.”

“how can I ever forget u little sis?” he chuckled.

“Soo how r u? and sh7al ma6oor? how’s the U.S? did u buy me anything?..” I just kept on blabbering and throwing questions at him.

“woah woah shway shway 3alay, everything’s great, we’re all fine, the States’s amazing. El mhm el mhm, the reason I called in the first place is cuz I wanted to ask you etha u wana come visit us for a while since you’ve got a holiday n all.”

“haaaih akeed I wana come! when? did u talk to mom and dad?” I yelled excitedly.

“yeah everything’s been taken care of, it’s just that I wanted to check with you and see if u feel like coming”, he replied, “oh and FYI the flight’s tomorrow”, he mumbled.

“what?!! tomorrow?! shu 2mrw?!! but I’m not ready yet!” I shrieked frantically.

“too bad, dabri 3mrch”, he chuckled, “yala I g2g now so I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“god okay”, I mumbled, “bas 7amdaan I ..” he hung up and I heard the dial tone. I sighed, sometimes my brother could be such a hard ass.

I groaned as I walked back to my room and flopped back down on my bed, only to stare up at the ceiling. I better get a goodnight sleep, I thought to myself.

*Next Day*
“bas you guys, umm my flight leaves tonight”, I mumbled to my friends as we were having lunch at Hédiard.

HE was there, even though I had not glanced his way since I entered, I knew that he had yet to take his gaze off of me. I could feel him boring holes into my skin with his eyes. He wanted me to look at him, to stare into those pleading eyes of his and listen to him. That reason alone is why I refused to acknowledge his presence, for if I took the chance and looked at him, I might fall into his trap and be just another name on his list.

“Shammoh are you serious?! 3nbo tawch radah, why are you going back now?”

“yeah tawna radeen, it’s just been a couple of months!” Meera cried out.

I was hardly listening to what they were saying. I didn’t care, it didn’t matter to me how much they tried to convince me to stay, there’s no way I’m gona change my mind. I could see him getting up from his seat and I hear footsteps coming toward us. He stood right by our table pretending to talk to one of the waiters, but I just continued to ignore his presence.

“madre a7s I wana go back, and I will go back, everything seems to be better back at the States”, I said as I drummed my fingers lightly against the maple colored table.

As soon as I said that one sentence, everything seemed to happen in slow motion. His perfect face slowly turned towards me, and I found it hard to swallow. He looked shocked, like he wasn’t expecting me to go back so soon. He dug into his pocket, pulled out his cell phone and frantically began punching some stuff on it.

A few seconds later, he walked back to his seat and I felt my phone vibrate on the table. New text. I opened it up to see who it was. I frowned.

“Are you seriously leaving tonight? Look, I’m sorry about what happened, just forget everything that has happened and let’s go back to how we used to be, like way back, just friends. I guess I screwed up, so sorry. –5leefah”

I bit my lip. Did I want to forgive him? My first reaction was no. Usually I hated going with my first reaction, but in this situation, I felt it fit. I clicked reply and typed furiously.

“I don’t think I wana be friends anymore. You fucked up. There's no chance of us being together if that was what you wanted.” I sent to him. I tapped my fingers against the table waiting for a reply.

I was pretty much numb. No incredible feelings were rushing through me like before. It was as if I was in some sort of trance. The trauma, probably now that I think about it. I felt absolutely nothing, and it was horrible. The hole in my chest where he was, was simply an empty space now that he was gone. Him and I used to be really close, the fact he could simply shatter everything we had like that made me wonder if he ever felt anything for me at all. Sure, he claimed to love me, but did he really? I didn’t think so.

I was so lost in my thoughts that I jumped when my phone vibrated again.
“I know, and I’m sorry. I don’t know what came over me, what made me want to do that. I know that’s not an excuse, but it’s all I got. I need some serious help.”

I chuckled a bit before replying.
“No, it’s not an excuse, and yeah you should get help.” When I was done texting, I took a quick glance at him and he was staring at his cell with a frown formed on his face.

I received another new text and got startled again.
“Yeah, I should. I really wanna talk to you about what happened, face to face, again.” he admitted. I gulped. Was I comfortable with seeing him again? The obvious answer was: not in the slightest.

“I don’t. I’m not comfortable around you anymore, 5leefa. I’m sorry, but I don’t think we should be talking to each other right now.” It was probably incredibly pathetic of me to say something like that over text, but I couldn’t do much else without having some sort of breakdown. Funny, I still didn’t cry. Not one tear had been shed. I’d been thinking about crying, sobbing really, like before, but I never did. He texted back quickly.

“Okay. I don’t blame you. I’m sorry again.” Not even then did I lose my self-control. I simply shut my phone and stared at my friends without blinking at all. I wasn’t sure exactly how to deal with all of this. I could see him getting up and heading to the seats outside.

I started to tremble again, holding myself in a way. Still there were no tears. I started to wonder what I was going to tell other people about what had happened. We used to be so close, everyone knew that. I sure as hell wasn’t about to tell them the real reason, so I had to think of some sort of cover story. A fight about something I didn’t want to talk about, possibly? I supposed it could work. I sighed, letting my head fall back against the chair, my gaze still firmly fixed ahead.

Some sort of battle was going on in my brain. A part of me was just telling me to shut him out completely. The other part wanted to hear him out, see what he had to say.

“agool I’m gona go outside shway, I need to take a call, it’s 7amdan u5oyah”, I told my friends.

“do you want me to come with you?” Meera asked me since she knew that I always ask her to tag along when I go anywhere, and vice versa.

“la 3ade it’s fine, ma ba6awel”, I replied as I walked towards the outer area of the restaurant.

Walking along, I spotted him leaning over the rail smoking a cigarette, “What do you want 5leefah?”

Wow, she actually noticed I was gone, Khalifa thought to himself.

He turned his head slightly to look at me, “ha achofch you came”, he smirked then turned back around.

“Whatever”, I scoffed, “do you want anything or what? ana mb fa’6yatlk.”

“Well, there is one question I think I'm entitled to ask you, considering you just dropped a bomb on me", he paused to see my reaction, but I just nodded.
“Why do you wana go back there?” he asked.

I just stared at him. After a few minutes his left eyebrow lifted a tiny bit, and I realized he was waiting for an answer.

“Is it because of me or something? I’ll stay away from you if that’s what you want. Do you want me to hate you, love you, what?” he asked once more.

I smirked at him, “I could care less if you love me or hate me, it's what they call life you know, life’s a bitch.”

He stared at me indifferently, his dark eyes locked into mine. I shivered. A blank expression found its way across his handsome face, and he didn’t utter a single word.

“Honestly, you know why I wana go? Because it’s miles and miles away from you,” I shot back as I headed straight back in without glancing at him once.

Life truly is a bitch, I grinned to myself pleased with what I’ve just done.

Final Goodbye*

2009-12-20T03:01:00.002+04:00

just a one-shot story ..

********

A pale hand traced over the door, dreading to enter the room that held his love. Taking a deep breath, he reluctantly opened the door. Stepping in his breath caught in his throat, even after all these years, his love still captivated him. He saw his one and only, lying on the bed, even though her skin was paler than before, he still thought she looked amazing.

He slowly made his way towards the bed, not wanting to disturb her. Sitting down, his eyes raked over her body, taking in her figure, every curve, every feature and engraving it in his memory. Taking a hold of the still hand on the bed, he couldn’t help but let his mind wander back to the day that shattered his perfect life.

Flashback
Hamad had walked into Dana’s art gallery, looking to the side he saw her with her head in her hands.

“Shamsa, Dana what’s going on?”

Shamsa looked up at her best friend’s boyfriend and sighed, her eyes filled with pain, “7amad, I think you should sit down.”

Hamad heard Dana’s silent sobs, and in one swift movement he was kneeling in front of his love, “baby, shu feech? what’s wrong?”

Dana looked up with tear stained cheeks, her eyes went from Hamad to Shamsa then back to Hamad.

Hamad looked over at Shamsa, who stood up and placed her hand on his shoulder. After a few minutes, he stood stiff, he couldn’t believe what Shamsa had just told him.

“No this can’t be, Dana you’re perfect, there must be some sort of mistake...” Hamad sat down looking over at Dana, he quickly wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close.

“I’m sorry, 7amad. We’ve ran so many tests and the results are all the same. Now, it seems that her body has given up, and unfortunately, ma ngdar ensawi shay, it’s too late for any treatment.”

Hamad heard a sob from the warm body that was clinging to his shirt. “Don’t worry Dana, we’ll find a way”, he said kissing his lover’s forehead.

“No 7amad, you heard what Shamsa said.”

“I refuse to believe that. I’m not letting you go”, Hamad cupped Dana’s cheek in his hand.

Dana closed her eyes at the touch. “7amad, I…”

“Maybe we could travel somewhere and…”

Dana shook her head, “no, it won’t work, it just won’t work.”

“Please, I can’t lose you. You’re everything to me.”

“7amad plz, I don’t wana fight this. I’ve come to terms with it”, Dana sobbed into Hamad’s chest. “Just keep loving me.”

He nodded, running his hand through her hair, “always”

End of Flashback

The faint sound of sheets shuffling, brought him back to reality. Looking over he was greeted by the sight of a small smile on his lover’s lips.

“Hey”, Dana whispered softly, looking at Hamad.

“Hey, sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you.”

She smiled slightly at his concern, “la you didn’t, I just pretended to be, so the nurse wouldn’t bother me.”

He couldn’t help but chuckle; that was his girl, always finding ways to get out of things. A frown quickly formed on his lips, remembering why he was here. He felt Dana slightly tug his hand.

“7amad, please don’t”, she pleaded knowing where his mind wandered to.

He felt anger boil in him. He pulled his hand away from her and began to pace, “Dana, I can’t. How do you expect me to let this happen? I’ve seen you get worse and it’s killing me! wallah it's just killing me”, he sighed retaking his seat next to her bed.

“7amad plz, 5ala9 I’ve learnt to accept this, plz ...”

“Why don’t you let me take you somewhere where you might get better treatment…” he pleaded grabbing a hold of her hand once again.

“No 7amad, you heard the doctors, they said that there’s no way for me to get better, 5ala9 it’s over”, she put her hand over his, “if there was a way, you know I would do it.”

“Please”, he begged, placing his forehead against hers, “I can’t lose you, Dana.”

Looking up, he could see the tears form in those chocolate-brown eyes that stole his heart. Sitting on the bed next to her, he brought his hand up and cradled her cheek, “you’re my life Dana, you’re my only reason to live.”

Dana stared into the dark-colored eyes of Hamad, the eyes she had spent so many years with. “As you are mine. Baby, there’s nothing we can do. I’ve come to accept that”, she said as the tears fell from her eyes.

“But I can’t, I can’t live without you”, Hamad said his voice full of sorrow and heartache, his eyes full of tears, “it’s too soon, we promised each other forever.”

Dana sighed, she knew he would have a hard time, but she wanted him to realize that it was time, and that one day he’d be okay, “I know we did, but this is my fate 7amad, plz don’t be sad”, she said as she pressed her hand against his cheek.

“How can I not, when you’re going to be taken away from me?” he said closing his eyes wanting to memorize the feel of her warm hand on his cheek. “It’s too soon”, he repeated, bringing his forehead to rest against Dana’s once more.

Dana swallowed the lump in her throat, “it might be, but just remember that I’ll always love you and I’ll be with you no matter what. Just remember the times we had, and how hard we fought for our love. I do not regret any of it. We have shared more love than anyone in this world and no one can take that away from us”, she whispered to him.

Hamad nodded, not trusting his voice, and kissed her cheek softly. He hated times like these, he wished he could have some sort of way to release the pain he felt in his heart.

“Promise me that you’ll go on and live for me”, she whispered as he broke the kiss.

Hamad began to shake his head, “I can’t promise you that, but I will promise that I’ll live as long as I can; as long as I can bear without you, which won’t be long.”

She sighed, “now plz, no more tears. Just stay here with me, hold me in your arms for one last time.”

Hamad nodded as he slowly wrapped his arms around Dana’s thin frame and cradled her to his chest, never wanting to let go.

“a7bk 7amad Al X, always and forever”, she whispered once they were settled.

“a7bch Dana Al X, for eternity”, he whispered and kissed her forehead.

As the sun began to set, Hamad held Dana to him, sitting in a comfortable silence. Nothing mattered to them right now, just the two of them and their time together, however long they had, both remembering their life together. He ran his hand through her soft hazel locks, kissing her forehead and cheek every so often. Soon her breathing slowed and she was fast asleep.

Throughout the night, Hamad held her in his arms. He could feel his lover begin to slip away, he cradled her closer to him not wanting to let go, trying to save any piece he could, every memory. Before sunrise, he knew there was nothing he could do, her heart had stopped. His love, his soul mate, his everything was gone, taken away from him. Cancer had taken the only thing that kept him alive, and now as he held his lover’s lifeless body to him, all he could do was be grateful for having one final goodbye.

Karma's a Bitch* #5

2009-12-19T10:09:00.004+04:00

Shamma’s P.O.V

It’s past midnight; I’m sitting alone in the music room lazily playing my guitar, lost in deep thoughts.

It's been a week since that day we talked, and I’ve been surprised since I expected lots of awkward and uncomfortable moments, angry stares and evil eyes, maybe even occasional tear shedding seeing as watching him with another girl has broken my heart no matter how much I pretend it didn't.

Luckily, none of that happened because we’ve drifted apart and we haven’t been talking to each other even when we bump into one another. I just deny his existence, pretend he’s not there, and he just tries to talk to me constantly but I just wouldn’t give him the chance.

I don't know exactly when I started to feel attracted to him, but the feeling was there. I would always stare at him, without him knowing. I had a crush. There was no use denying it. I had it for him so bad, it was almost an infatuation. I never showed these feelings to anyone though, except Meera. He didn’t know, sweet little innocent Shamma, was obsessed with him. Bleh, pathetic.

He just loves to flirt, he loves being a player. He is well aware of the fact that he broke a lot of hearts during his life.

At the time, the time when I was sixteen, I thought Khalifa would stop being a player, a badass. I thought this crazy obsession might turn into something more. Looking back, it was just a little crush back then. Back then. But times have come and gone, right?

I'm nineteen now, and I know how I feel. I do have feelings for him, I admit that, despite certain things. But I’m gona forget those feelings, forget about Khalifa. He’ll never stop playing around with people’s hearts. He’s only gona keep hurting me and apologizing after every single time, that’s the way it goes with him and girls, and I don’t want that ...

The buzzing of my phone startled me from my deep thoughts and all thoughts of Khalifa left my head. That's weird i thought, who would be calling at 3a.m.? I took a look at the screen, and my caller ID said it was an unknown number. The phone kept buzzing and it was only a matter of time before it stopped ringing.

It started ringing once more, but this time it wasn't an unknown number, it was an international call. I thought I’d just ignore, but they kept calling, once, twice, 3 times, so I picked it up.

"umm, hello?"

"hey you, guess who"

I recognized this deep masculine voice, but I couldn't quite put a face to who the voice belonged to. “uhh..”

“shu shammoh shaklech nsaitena ..”

Karma's a Bitch* #4

2009-12-18T15:10:00.003+04:00

Shamma’s P.O.V

I got into my car and told the driver to just drive with no destination in mind. I sighed, my gaze darting over to look at him through the window as I drove away. I reached into my Hermes bag to pull out my wallet. I opened the clasp with a flick of my finger and I’m met with a picture, I looked down at it, it was a picture of him and I. We were so happy and care-free back then, we were ‘just friends’, nothing more, nothing less .. or that’s what he thought at least.
That’s the problem... things aren’t the same anymore, things have changed.

I shook my head, my bangs falling over my eyes. I sat up straight and pushed my hair away as realization finally hit me, he doesn’t care ...
I made my decision at that moment. I decided that I was worth more than this.

I sighed as I remembered the way things were running my fingers over the photo’s edge. A few minutes later, I reluctantly returned the photo back into my wallet. Gone were those days ...

I snapped back into reality! Why the hell do I care? Why am I making a big deal out of nothing? I have to face the fact that he obviously doesn’t care, I have to get used to it. Most importantly, I’ve got to forget he ever told me anything, just erase every single word he told me from my mind, forget that he told me he loved me ..
I scoffed, what kind of fucked up love is this?! Today, he proved something to me, that he doesn’t know what love actually is.

I decided to drive down to the beach instead of home since I needed time to think things through, and the beach house was the perfect place. No one was there. I sat all alone on that beach, our beach, and looked out across the darkened, rippling water. The sun was just beginning to set, the blazing yellow fading into a cool, gentle orange.

I sat on that one smooth rock near the water, with my knees pulled against my chest, listening to the unending rhythm of the waves upon the shore. I thought of all the times I’d sat in this very same spot, away from the rest of the world. This place is my own personal heaven; no matter what happens in my life, I could always come here to be comforted.

It’s getting kinda late so I guess I should be heading back home right about now. As I was getting up, I noticed a figure standing on the beach. Who is this mysterious figure? I walked up and noticed that it was Khalifa. Why is he here? What does he want? All those questions were running through my head.

“Shamma..”

I closed my eyes for a second and stared out emptily onto the expanse of ocean that laid out before me.

“I’m sorry, I really am, I promised you I would never let anyone hurt you, and I’m the one who just hurt you.”

He stood there looking at me, I didn’t look back at him. He listened to me breathe for a second and continued to talk.“Can you please just look at me? Just for a second?”

I took a deep breath and turned my head to look at him.

“I just wana know one thing, why are you feeling down? I told u I loved you years ago, but did you say it back? No .. you didn’t, you said you didn’t feel anything for me. Am I right or what?! Isn’t that what you told me?”

I finally said something, the only thing I thought I could say and not reveal anything.
“You THINK you love me, but you don’t. ‘I love you’ is not like ‘good morning’, you know? To say it, you got to mean it. Don't you say you love me, don't say you need me, don't say it. Don't say it cuz I know deep inside you don't mean it, don’t say it cuz you don't know the meaning of this word, so stop saying it cuz I KNOW you don't love me, and now you’ll know that ‘I’ don’t love you!”

That instant EVERYTHING changed ..

**********************************************************************************
Khalifa’s P.O.V

An hour later, I just drove aimlessly and searched frantically for her. I looked everywhere, but I couldn’t find her. Not willing to give up now that I’d found the courage to talk to her, I eventually tracked her down. I found her, at our place, lost in her thoughts.

She got up since she was just about to leave and started walking towards me because she couldn’t quite recognize who I was. As she came closer, she realized that it was me.

“Shamma”, I whispered into the night as her name rolled off my tongue.

She turned her back towards me and continued to stare out into the ocean. I apologized for hurting her, but she just wouldn’t look at me.

“Can you please just look at me for a second?”

I stood frozen as she turned to look at me with her startling, brown eyes. A warm feeling washed over my body.

I asked her why she felt that way when she saw me with those other girls. Why did she look so sad? She clearly stated that she doesn’t love me more than a ‘friend’. Am I missing something over here? Does she see me as something more than just a friend?

She finally said something, something I’d never thought she’d say to me. She told me that I clearly don’t love her, that I duno what love is, that I duno the meaning of the word ‘love’, and that SHE doesn’t love me.

Maybe she has point, maybe I truly don’t love her YET, maybe my feelings towards Shamma are more than what you’d feel towards a friend but not close to love yet. Obviously I have strong feelings for her, but after that talk she gave me, I have found out that I dont’t just have a crush on her, nor do I really love her. I think I just really really like her. All I know is that I want to be with her, more than just friends, more than what we used to be.
If only she feels the same way towards me, if only ..

Karma's a Bitch* #3

2009-12-16T18:04:00.003+04:00

Shamma’s P.O.V

A few months have passed since my arrival back home, Khalifa was nowhere to be seen, and if you ask me how my life is at the moment, I’d tell you perfect. You see right now everything is just right, I’m living my life to the fullest, I have almost everything I could possibly need, the perfect family, perfect circle of friends, and that’s all that matters at the time. Then HE walked back into my life and fucked all that up! HE turned my life into complete bullshit.

My friends and I have headed to Starbucks to grab some coffee and just chill. Everyone was chillaxin and just havin a good time. I was busy typing away on my blackberry when HE walked in.

Meera’s eyes popped out of their sockets and her jaw dropped down to the floor. “oh my god u guys, check out that dude that just walked in.”

All of them turned their heads to look at him, while I was in a world of my own. They’re always like this when it comes to guys, especially hotties, so I didn’t really care about what was happening at the moment or who they were ogling.
“mashallah 3alaih!” “5saraa kel hal jamal and he’s with those blonde bimbos.” “Look at that ditz kaif gab’6tnah!”

“Shammooh! Just look at him!” “Just a quick look, la yfootch” “Chofeeh .. bas na’6ra w7da!” “Just ONE look! You won’t regret it trust me”, they kept going on and on while I was too occupied with my phone.

He was moving closer to where we were seated meaning we could get a better glimpse of him. Meera was still going gaga over him, “Yee shu hal jamal hayda msh ma32ooool”, when all of a sudden her mouth shaped into perfect ‘O’, she covered her mouth with her hand, *gasps* “laykoon this is…!?!”

I still wasn’t aware of what was going on around me, so I looked up from my phone and turned to face her, “Shu esalfah? What’s going on?” I asked carelessly then turned back to my phone once again.

She pointed her finger at something behind me, “Look! over there!” I lifted my head and looked around, but there’s no one behind me. I turned back to her confused, “where? There’s nothing there that would make you wana gasp and go all ‘OMG’!”

“Not here..”, she pointed again but to a different area, “there”

I turned my head to look once more and I wish I didn’t. I just froze .. I couldn’t believe my eyes. There he was .. there was Khalifa, standing right before my eyes, with his arm practically embracing some bimbo’s waist. I was gona shift my gaze not wanting him to see my face, unfortunately it didn't work just as I had thought. I could sense that he stiffened and his eyes widened as soon as he saw me. He let his lips linger on her skin for a few seconds as he kissed her cheek while she was hanging onto him like some lovesick puppy. I quickly shook my head and our gaze broke. His eyes were locked on mine, my eyes were fixed elsewhere. Was it all a lie? Am I not a drug that he can’t stay away from 3ala goltah? Didn’t he mean everything he said to me?

I tilted my head slightly so that I could look at him out of the corner of my eye once more, he met my gaze and I could see the guilt wash over him. I held back my tears and walked away. I didn’t want to look at him, I didn’t want to look at anyone, I just wanted to disappear …

**********************************************************************************
Khalifa’s P.O.V

I walked through the door of Starbucks with a ridiculous grin on my face, and a bunch of girls attached to my hip. As soon as I stepped into the place, every single head turned to look at me. This isn’t something new to me, I mean it happens all the time, I’m used to it by now. People gawk at me everywhere I go, and girls practically follow me around like paparazzi.

I walked to the counter with certain confidence and arrogance. While I was waiting for my order, I put out my arm to encircle one of the girls’ slender waist while she wrapped her own arms around me and rested her hands on my back.

You know how sometimes you can feel someone watching you .. well I had a feeling like someone was watching me. The feeling of eyes on me was unmistakable, I swear I could feel someone’s gaze burning right through me. I turned to see who it was, right there I saw the two most beautiful eyes, it was her. She was so stunning that she could take anyone's breath away by just a single glance.

I can see that she didn’t want me to see her, but she was too late. We both froze, our eyes locked. Not a word was spoken between us. I felt a rush of fury deep inside me as I remembered how she left, so I tightened my grip around the girl’s waist, and touched my lips lightly to the soft skin of her cheek without taking my eyes off of HER. I let my lips linger on her skin for a few seconds before breaking it. She looked away from me breaking the gaze clearly hiding a pained expression, while my eyes were still locked on hers. Why the pained expression, I thought. She clearly stated that she doesn’t feel anything for me, or does she?

She turned to look at me one last time then walked away, away from me, away from all of this. Unwanted guilt washed over me .. the regret of hurting her was stabbing me like no knife could .. I wanted to go to her, to hold her gently. I have never done anything to hurt her before. Had I chosen wrong? Did I hurt Shamma by doing this? I sighed softly. Even if I had been wrong, it was too late to take back the pain, the pain that I’ve just caused her ..

Karma's a Bitch* #2

2009-12-15T18:32:00.003+04:00

Shamma’s P.O.V

After that day .. the day that Khalifa confessed his love to me, I decided that I can’t be in the same place as him. I knew that things would be awkward between us .. bigtime! That’s because even though I mentioned that Khalifa was a player, he never really treated me the same way he treated those other girls he hooked up with. He was very protective of me and ma kan y’r6a 3alayah when 7ad y’3la6 3alay or sumthin no matter what. He would never let anyone piss me off or try to bully me. But he’s still a stereotypical bad boy, and does all the usual bad boy things.

That was when I knew I had to get away ..

If I had stayed and got together with him, I could have been just another bee in the hive since he would think that I was just like any other girl. He might have bossed me around and treated me like shit after him and I had gotten together. I mean, that's how he ususally treats his "girls". When he told me he loved me, maybe he didn't actually mean it, maybe he thought that this is love. He could've just said so we'd be together. I know how it feels to be head over heels for someone, but you have to weigh the pros and cons of dating a "bad boy" before going for it.

Therefore, I decided that it’s better for me to take my mind off all of this and join my brothers in the U.S. I was 16 at the time meaning I had a year left of school. I decided to continue my studies abroad as well as begin my university years over there.

Flashback
I was walking down to kitchen one night when I heard my mum and dad talking with my brothers, M6ar and 7amdan. I moved closer and pressed my ear against the door.

M6ar: “Bas umaya n7n sayren ndrs mb sayren 7ag l3ban w hal 5rabe6.”

7amdan: “Haih umaya 9a7 kalam M6ar, w a9lan bas 2 or 3 years w banrja3 el blad.”

Mum: “Ya3ne lazem el wa7ed ysafer bara3 3shan ykamel drasta? 3ndkm mlyon jam3a fel blad!”

Fate seems to be on my side, I thought. The voice in my head kept telling me, this is it Shamma .. this is what you wanted, to get away .. don’t let this chance slip away.

7amdan: “Bas umaya hnak a7la el ajwa2. Ajwa2 Amreeka! T3arfeen shu y3ne!? Ensawi eli nbah mta ma nba w kel shay 3ala kaifna. w el banat! Y5rab bait el banat eli hnak, enti bas lo tchofenhum! 6arr! 6aaarrr! Kel w7da a7la 3an el thanya, uff 3athaab...”

Mum: “7amdano yal sbal shu yales tgool! 6arr w ma 6arr! laa w jdam umah ba3ad, shu matst7e enta!”

M6ar: “Ehee 7amdan chub enta wela bayeek kaf a7een!”
He whispered to his brother, “yal 7mar la teels tgool hal kalam jdamha wela wala bat6b America!”

M6ar: “Umaya ma 3alaich mnah hal ahbal ymza7 wyach. El mhm hnak a7san 3sb el sh’hadat w ban7a9el sh’3l a7san w che t3arfen.”

Mum *sighs*: “5la9 braykum sawo eli tbonah. Ubokum 3ndkm, el shoor 3ndah hoh.”

7amdan: “A9lan uboya ma 3ndah mane3, bas kan ybana nkalmech enti w na5eth mwafa8tech awal.”

I pushed the door open, entered the office and screamed at the top of my lungs, “Maaamaaa ana ba3ad aba aseeer wyahum!”

Mum: “Balach t9ar5eeen! Wain tbain tsereen enti el thanya ba3ad?!”

Me: “Mama plz allah y5alech 5aleeni aseer adrs bara3 wyahum.”

Mum: “Grri mkanch a7sanlch! Shu el 6ari klkm tbon tsafroon?!”

Me: “Yala 3ad mama 5aleeni aseer. Mthl ma gal ma6oor 3an el shahadat eli hnak w el sh’3l eli ngdar n7a9lah ba3dain.”

Mum: “Shu hal jeel hatha! N7n ma kna che yom kna f 3mrkm. Baseer argd abrakli mn mjabal wyohkm! May59ne feekum, 3ndch uboch w seeri tfahmay wyah, yallah t9b7on 3ala 5air.”
She stormed out of the room and went upstairs.

I went to my dad, sat right next to him on the couch and gave him my puppy-dog eyes since I knew he couldn’t resist. He treated me just like a princess since I'm his only 'little girl' and abdn ma yrdli 6alab.
Me: “Baba mmkn aseer wyahm? w gabel matgool shay, trane sayra 3shan el drasa mb ay sbab thani.”

Dad: “T3arfeen eni magdar agool la2 yom tsaween hal wayh hatha. Bas hal marrah ra7 agool la2 lanch bnt w ma ystwe el bnt tsafer ro7ha fel 3mr hatha, w e5wanch bel zoor r’6aina enhm yseroon.”

I started whining cuz i really wanted to go, “Bas baba laish?! Plzz wallah basawe eli tbonah bas 5alone aseer, w ana mb broo7i, 3nde ma6oor w 7amdan wyay. Baba yallah 3ad allah y5aleek.”

Dad: “7abeebti ma ystwe. Enti bnaya, shu baygolon el nass? Mhayteen bntkm ro7ha hnak w madre shu .. tr’6ain 3ala 3mrch enti?”

Me: “La ma7ad baygool shay etha ydron enah ana wya e5wani w ana mb sayra a9ee3 hnak, sayra adrs. Ha my only reason.”

M6ar: “Uboya ma3alaih 5alha and w 7amdan bn76ha fe 3yoonah w msta7eel shay ystwebha hnak damna mawjoden.”

Me: “Sma3t baba? A7een 3ade aseer? Plzz plz plz!” I pouted and innocently batted my eyelashes.

Dad: *sighs* “5ala9 seeri baba dam e5wanch ma3ach.”

I started jumping up and down, then went to kiss my dad on his head.
Me: “Thank you, thank you, thank you. Wallah babaye’6 el wayh, you won’t regret it!”

I was ecstatic! No words could describe the way I was feeling right then. I was over the moon. Can you blame me?! I was gona live in the U.S! On my own! Well my brothers are with me, but whatever, there aren’t any parents! Can things get any better?!

End of flashback

And now I was finally heading back to Abu Dhabi, back to my hometown, back to where it all happened. I’m 19 now, meaning 3 years had passed since it all started. 3 years since I have seen Khalifa. I had just finished my 2nd year of university and decided to head back home with my best friend, Meera.

‘Fireflies’ by Owl City was blasting on my iPod when the captain announced that we were about to land.

“This is the captain speaking. As we have commenced our final descent to Dubai’s airport, would you kindly return to your seat and fasten your seat belts until the airplane has come to a stop and the captain has switched off the seat-belt signs. Thank you.”

After we got off the plane, checked in and all that, we headed to the car to start our journey to Abu Dhabi. The black G-class drove smoothly down the street. Meera and I were looking out the window as we passed by the beach with its soft beige sand and turquoise water. Kids running with kites, teenage boys showing off on their surfboards for their girlfriends, girls tanning in their bikinis, and others sipping drinks and gossiping. I smiled as I watched all of this through my Chanel aviators.

At that moment, I was glad to be back home, well for now at least ..

Karma's a Bitch* #1

2009-12-14T21:10:00.005+04:00

Shamma’s P.O.V

I snapped my compact mirror shut, crossed my legs and sighed. I looked out the window taking in Beverly Hills and started fidgeting with my hands. I knew that a lot would change since I move back home. I mean come on, can you blame me?! I’ve basically lived in the States for the past few years and I’ve left a lot behind me in Abu Dhabi. I left that one person whom I’d die for in a blink of an eye. He told me that he’s head over heels in love with me and what did I do? I practically shattered his heart into pieces and ran away as soon as I got the chance! What the hell would happen when I see him? How am I supposed to react? Most importantly, what is he going to do as soon as he realizes I’m back for good?

Meera, my BFF, noticed that I was freaking out and started to comfort me. She knew that Khalifa "claimed" he was into me and she also knew how I felt about him. Even though I was actually so into him too, I just couldn’t let him know that. I had the hugest crush ever on him, but he was your typical bad boy, a flirt, a player, and I just didn’t want to play the broken-hearted girl.

“Ufff shammoh radainah! Gtlch everything’s gonna turn out just fine. Enti bas stop worrying!”

“Meeroh wallah I can’t! A7s enah he can’t stand me. T5aylay maya36eeni wayh wala ysawele salfah when I see him! You know what happened between us. I told you all about it wela tbaini athakrch beli sawaita feeh?!”

“La ma y7tay shammani I know what happened, bas 5ala9, let’s just drop it. I bet he just put everything behind him and moved on with his life. Hay salfa w ent’hat.”

Flashback
I was walking to my locker after school when my cell phone beeped indicating that I received a message. It was a relative of mine, Khalifa. I had this secret crush on him. Him and I were kinda close mn bain all our other cousins. I opened the msg and started reading it.

“Shamma mmkn armsch 3an salfah? It’s kinda important, so plz meet me 3nd my car as soon as you see this.”

I got this weird feeling in the pit of my stomach. I thought that something bad might have happened since Khalifa wasn’t in school that day, so I went outside to the parking lot as fast I can. When I got there, 5leefa was leaning against his orange Lamborghini with his arms crossed looking SO DAMN HOT! He’s the type of guy who makes heads turn as soon as he steps into a place. I just stood there staring at him from a distance. I was so mesmerized, I couldn’t look away.

I bet you’re all wondering what 5leefa looks like. Well, he’s got this really hot tan, he’s tall, has dark messy hair and the most gorgeous smile that would make any girl melt.
His body is perfect since he's well built, not overly muscular as some bodybuilders are, but just enough to give him that handsome physique. He has broad shoulders, well-defined muscles, a sculpted back and a slight six pack.
He has a long syoofi nose, defined cheekbones, this sexy scar on his left eyebrow, a slight dimple on his right cheek, pink pouty lips with a small beauty mark next to them and his eyes are a light shade of brown which have this spark in them as well as long thick lashes. *sigh* he’s every girl’s dream.

He had his aviator shades on and was wearing a white kandora as well as a cap. He had that whole bad boy thing going on. I started walking closer to him, but he didn’t seem to notice my presence. He seemed to be lost in deep thoughts.

I waved my hands in front of his eyes, “Hello, earth calling!”

He looked my way, smiled slightly and took off his shades. I looked straight into his eyes. Daamn! Those gorgeous eyes! I shook my head. Snap out of it Shamma!

“Ohh shamma you’re here. Mta yaity? Sorry knt sar7an I didn’t realize you were here already.”

“La 5aloof 3ade. El mhm shu esalfah? 3an shu knt tba trmsne?”

“Shu mashay 5aloof sh7alk, shu mswe? People say hi you know, I mean I haven’t seen you all day.”

I giggled and said, “sorry wala tz3al, how r u? shu mswe? how’s life?”

He smirked showing his perfect pearly teeth, “everything’s great, what about you?”

“Good good. Yala enzain tell me, what’s up?”

He bit his lip and I can sense that he got kinda nervous.

“Ohh yea that. Umm, 3ade we go somewhere private and talk? Cuz well, u know, it’s kinda important I told ya.”

“Yeah sure come on, we’ll just sit on the benches close by the basketball court. No one’s there right now.”

We walked silently over there. I took a glance at 5leefa, he was kinda distracted by something. I wonder what he could possibly be thinking of. As soon as we got to the benches, I noticed 5leefa fidgeting with his cell phone.

“5leefa yallah tell me shu mstwe? I’m startin to freak out.”

“la wala shay, el safah w mafeha enah I’m about to tell you something huge so just listen and don’t interrupt lain ma a5ale9 kalamy. When I’m done, you can do eli tbainah. Ok well here it goes, umm, shit I never thought it’d be this hard. God, I’ll just spit it out bdon laf w dawaran. Shamma I think I’m falling for you, and I’m fallin real hard. Wala marrah 7asait b this feeling towards any other girl. Wallah it’s like this feeling is taking over me. You’re like a drug and I can’t stay away from you..”

I was so shocked, I mean I never really thought that this would be coming from 5leefa out of all these people. He’s a frickin player! How am I supposed to know if he’s playin around or not? God, shu asawe now?!

“5leefa what are you sayin? I honestly duno what to tell you.”

He softly reached out and grabbed my hand.

“Wait, I’m not done yet, gtlch latga63eni. Anyways, I tried to convince myself enah it’s nothing. 7awalt ag9 3a 3mre and tell myself that it’s all just in my head. Bas I couldn’t! I really tried, but this feeling just won’t leave me alone. I wasn’t gona tell you at first, I thought I’d just keep it to myself and maybe everything would go back to the way it was. But my feelings just kept growing as the days pass and I couldn’t keep it inside me any longer so I thought it’s better I tell you and let it all out. umm, the point is I love you Shamma Al X.”

I was speechless. I was actually SPEECHLESS! I tried to say something, but nothing at all is coming out of my mouth.

“Shamma? Say something plz, anything! Allah y5aleech just talk. Don’t leave me hanging. I know what you’re thinking, enah I’m a player and all bas ana mb yales ag9 3alaich. Wallah the thought of playing on you never crossed my mind. I would never do that to you. Everything I said is coming straight from my heart.”

I slowly pulled my hand away from his and stood up.

“I’m sorry, I just don’t feel the same way. I really have to go now.”

I hurried to my car and told the driver to speed away. Tears started to form in my eyes unwillingly. My head was filled with many thoughts. I never thought 5leefa had feelings for me. I thought I was like a sister to him. I never thought that he thinks of me as anything more than that. It was all just too much for me. I knew things wouldn’t be the same between us anymore. I basically left him heartbroken out there. I kinda did feel the same way about him. Why didn’t I just tell him the truth? why?! Because he has been with half the girls in the country! Because he’s the biggest player on earth, that’s why! What am I supposed to do when I see him now? I can’t face him. I had to get away, I just had to!

End of flashback